Seamless, the once-simple and reliable food delivery app, has undergone an unwanted and ill-advised redesign. Archived orders? Gone. A user-friendly interface? L-O-L. A functioning website? Depends on how you define “functioning.” Fare thee well, Seamless and burn in hell: you’ve ruined a good thing for absolutely no reason.

Calling the travesty a “site refresh,” the company claims the redesign makes it “easier to eat all the foods you love on our new Seamless site.” Except it doesn’t. Because it doesn’t work.

The results—apparently a back-end integration with GrubHub, paired with a botched front-end facelift—are counterintuitive, at best. Restaurant-specific searches are all but disabled. Saved addresses and credit cards have disappeared or reset without warning (hope whoever’s living in my old 3rd Street apartment liked the sushi I sent them last week.)

Not all of the restaurants listed on the old site made the switch, prompting a new FAQ “Where is my restaurant/my favorite restaurant.” This, at least, was apparently an unintentional screw-up among the maelstrom of intentional garbage updates.

Same goes for your order history: here’s the 411, they were “unable to transfer some of your past orders,” and you’ll just have to deal with it.

Hmmm. Well, as they say in breakups, maybe it’s not the Seamless redesign. Maybe it’s me. Who’s to say? Wait, no, it’s definitely the Seamless redesign.

And there’s no way the company is unaware of how badly this update has gone. Or at least their social media team does: the Seamless twitter page is filled with replies apologizing for the company’s shitty new website.

Maybe this is for the best. Maybe it’s time to get off our computers and venture out into the world, to gather our food from the source (Chipotle, anyone?) like our forefathers before us. I could be mad, but I think I’ll just dance in the embers as Seamless burns instead. And then we can all go out for brunch.

Update 5:30 p.m.

A Seamless/GrubHub spokesperson says they’re well-aware of the website’s issues and are “working quickly to resolve them.”

“We are aware of some technical issues and are working quickly to resolve them so that people can get back to easily ordering food from their favorite local restaurants. The happiness of our diners is incredibly important to us and we’ll continue to use diner feedback to make improvements to our refreshed site.”

Additionally, to clarify one topic of commentary on the article, we do not charge a fee to delivery drivers; we receive a commission from restaurants for each order placed on our platform. Further, per New York state law, restaurateurs are required to give delivery drivers the full tip provided by each diner.

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