The Best April Fools' Day Pranks, Japes, and Jests

Alex Pareene · 04/01/16 04:35PM

Phew! Another April Fools’ Day come and gone. Did you make it through without falling for one of those hilarious pranks that brands, blogs, and businesses love to spring on us each year? Wait—don’t answer yet. Maybe you got punked without even knowing it! Here are some of today’s best practical jokes that you might have missed.

LIRR Service Is All Fucked Up, As Revelation Foretold 

Kelly Conaboy · 09/02/15 10:02AM

For 90 minutes this morning, Long Island Rail Road service was suspended coming into and going out of Penn Station due to “signal trouble.” For 90 minutes this morning, LIRR riders inundated the E, 7, and 2/3 subway lines, as the MTA cross-honored their LIRR fares. For 90 minutes this morning, Satan was released from his prison, deceiving the nations in the four corners of the earth—LIRR and MTA—to gather them for battle.

Why Do I Still Live in New York City?: A Roundtable

Jason Parham · 06/01/15 12:05PM

Weeks ago, reeling from a night of booze and bad decisions, I ventured to a local Bayou-themed restaurant in search of comfort food. I wanted to absorb the last of the alcohol that remained from just hours before, fully determined to get rid of my hangover. When you live alone, this is not an uncommon practice. I often eat out by myself—it’s hard to wait on friends to make brunch plans when all you want to do is devour a plate of syrup-coated waffles—so it wasn’t strange when the bartender and the gray-haired gentleman to my right decided to include me in their conversation. “What do you think?” he said. They had been discussing rising property values in the neighborhood, and the ills of gentrification. The bartender mentioned how a small patch of dirt between two brownstones, just blocks from the restaurant and my apartment, was going for $2 million. “There was also that old gas station in Crown Heights that sold for 30 million recently,” she said. “How is anybody expected to live here now? It’s just too much.”

Here's What Happens When You Report Sexual Misconduct on the Subway

Anonymous · 05/08/15 10:40AM

Yesterday morning, between 9:30 and 9:40 a.m. (yes, I was running late to work) I was the victim of sexual misconduct at the Fulton Street subway stop, at the exit near Fulton and William streets. The MTA and the NYPD failed to provide substantial measures in responding to and reporting the incident.

Are More MTA Fare Increases Coming? Please, No, Anything But That

Dayna Evans · 04/28/15 10:17AM

New York City’s Metropolitan Transportation Authority is in yet another bind. If state lawmakers do not agree to fund the remainder of the MTA’s five-year capital plan, the deadline for which is coming up in June, there may be a need to increase fares and tolls by 15 percent in order to make ends meet.