A List of Things to Say to Sound as if You Understand the Super Bowl, Dummy

Emma Carmichael · 02/04/12 05:00PM

Not everyone knows football, and that's okay—even if you're an American. Everyone, though, is perfectly capable of sounding as if they might know a thing or two about football should the need arise. Here's what to yell at your TV and friends in order to sound like you maybe-kinda-sorta know what's going on this Sunday evening.

Things I Hate About Christmas

Brian Moylan · 12/15/11 06:30PM

Christmas is probably my favorite time of the year. There are so many great things about it: candy canes, presents, family togetherness, days off work, drunken holiday parties, crappy Christmas movies on ABC Family, Rudolph! What's not to love? Actually there are a handful of things not to love, and here they are.

Gifts for People You Hate

Maureen O'Connor · 12/05/11 02:45PM

Welcome to Gift Guide Week at Gawker, where we instruct on how best to fritter away your hard-won dollars on meaningless tokens of consumerism, because a bastard baby was born in a pile of hay on a clear night 2000 years ago. Let's start with the people you want to cross off your shopping list: people you hate.

Ten Good Things That Happened in the Last Ten Years

Richard Lawson · 09/09/11 03:00PM

Most people would agree that the ten years since the September 11th terrorist attacks have been pretty shitty ones. War, disaster, and economic collapse have all seemed to come pouring out of the hole at Ground Zero as if from Pandora's box. But! Light!

How To Look Busy at Work in August

Brian Moylan · 08/02/11 02:53PM

Welcome to August, everyone! It's the month where not one single thing gets done at anyone's job anywhere in the world. But just because there is nothing to do doesn't mean you can just sit at your desk and do nothing. Here's a guide to making yourself look busy without troubling with any actual work.

Six Things That Should Be Banned From Bars Forever

Brian Moylan · 06/28/11 04:52PM

Bars exist for people to hang out with their friends, watch the game, unwind, and maybe play a game of pool or pick up a bit of strange for the evening. What bars are not for are all your silly games that are not only annoying, but dangerous. People are getting sued!

The Rules for Wearing Flip-Flops

Brian Moylan · 01/05/11 03:31PM

Everyone is in a tizzy because Barack Obama dared to wear flip-flops while on vacation. Really? Just so there's never confusion on this matter again, we're going to break down the rules for when it's appropriate to wear them.

How to Make Every New Year's Resolution Stick for Good

Brian Moylan · 12/29/10 03:45PM

Every January 1, everyone wakes up with the best intentions of improving themselves and living a better life. By March 12, all those ideals are out the window. Not this year! Here's how to make your resolution last all year.

What to Do When You Fall Down

Richard Lawson · 12/29/10 01:09PM

The Northeast is currently a slushy, icy, slippery mess. This could lead to many falls! You know, hilarious moments when people topple to the ground, cursed by gravity. But what if that person is you? What do you do??

A Gawker Guide to Last-Minute Christmas Gifts

Richard Lawson · 12/20/10 12:57PM

Christmas is only five days away, and it's likely that some of us (ahem) haven't done any shopping at all. Need some ideas? Here are some gift suggestions for the various weirdos you might still have to shop for.

The 10 Most Annoying Christmas Songs

Brian Moylan · 12/15/10 03:19PM

Christmas carols can be beautiful reminders of one of the most exciting times of the year. They can also be horrible scourges that make you want to poke sharp objects in your ears. Here are some of the worst offenders.

The 10 Most Depressing Jobs in America

Brian Moylan · 12/09/10 04:43PM

You totally think your job sucks, right? Well, you only have it really bad if you're employed in one of these 10 fields, since these are the jobs most likely to have caused a major depression in the last year.

10 Things I Love About Winter

Brian Moylan · 12/06/10 04:02PM

This morning there was snow during my morning commute. Snow! Though it doesn't officially start until December 21, winter is here. This cold, dark, depressing season totally sucks, but here are 10 things to get us through until March.

How to Talk About Anything on Thanksgiving

Brian Moylan · 11/25/10 04:15PM

Most Americans spend Thanksgiving with their families. That's great, except sometimes the conversation can be strained, awkward, or downright contentious. Here's how to keep the peace and have something to talk about until the pumpkin pie is served.

7 Things You Should Never Do in a Club

Brian Moylan · 11/08/10 04:10PM

Going to nightclubs would be a lot more enjoyable if people knew how to behave properly. Follow these seven simple yet important rules and you'll make life easier for everyone.