As with any story involving Lindsay Lohan, we have good and bad news to report. We noted back in March that the queen of all things Lesbian Chic would finally follow in every other bored starlet's wobbly footsteps and design a clothing line. And, being the non-traditionalist that she is, Lohan intended on sticking to leggings. Which made sense, considering the practical usage of leggings when taking a walk of shame, in need of a secure and moisture-proof hiding place for substances, and stretching out one's legs while passed out in SUVs. And leave it to Lindsay to turn the otherwise boring piece of clothing into a racy collection of pieces custom-made for any girl looking for a comfy place to rest her knees mid-blow job. Not to mention a surefire way to slip on a pair of "ankle gloves" and alert every male within 30 miles just how eager you are to spread said ankles:
While you're celebrating another Friday with Irish car bombs, smokes, and An Actor's Guide to Manorexia (or tequila, for those of you who aren't Colin Farrell), perhaps you don't realize we all have a much bigger reason to celebrate today – it's Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson's four month anniversary! As with all immature 15-year-olds, these two lovebirds are professing their love via text message. But words alone will never portray true love (suck it, Shakespeare), they need the stuff! So kick back with a bottle of Cuervo, and allow us to present our Top 10 Gift Ideas for this adorably new couple!
As the Daily Mirror reported yesterday, Lindsay Lohan's personal assistant/roommate/rough sex partner Samantha Ronson decided to give her bestest girlfriend one highly suggestive 22nd birthday gift: a Cartier diamond ring worth close to $22k. As these pictures show (closer look after the jump), Ronson picked up the pricey bauble on a sunny shopping trip with Lindsay over the weekend, and Lohan didn't waste any time slipping the ring on the one finger where rings mean anything — the treacherous inch of skin on a girl's left hand traditionally reserved for engagement gems. But this isn't the first time Lindsay and Sam have projected their love via hand decor, and judging by the way this couple handled their first Promise Ring engagement, we're worried Sam doesn't know what we do: sentimental jewelry is not the way to Lindsay's (still intact!) heart...
Madonna's epic reputation as a racy, sexual icon who lives life with "no regrets" has encountered a few speed bumps in recent years. The transition from Material Girl to Earth Mother circa Ray Of Life in 1998 marked the most significant rupture to her free-wheeling Erotica-encapsulated days of drugs, sex, and whispered rock 'n roll, an "epiphany" she credited to Kabbalah. But after the ethereal schtick grew tired, the older but not necessarily wiser Madge launched a campaign to reclaim her It
Girl Woman cred by slipping Christina and Britney some tongue, spreading her legs for Hard Candy, and using that handy Husband Emasculation method perfected by Katherine Heigl to resurrect her old identity as a shockworthy icon of sorts. And after hearing just what kind of "sordid" revelations await us in her estranged brother's tell-all memoir Life With My Sister Madonna, we don't think Madge's reps should even bother issuing a denial about Christopher Ciccone's book. Anecdotes about same-sex makeout sessions, drug parties with studio execs, and straight-edge Guy Ritchie's alleged "homophobic" tendencies, all of which actually add up to a convincing pro-Madonna campaign...
After sufficiently mourning the split between Justin Long and Drew Barrymore by giving our iBook a tearful embrace, we found ourselves facing a familiar Drew-inspired dilemma: figuring out who the serial dater extraordinaire will add to her illustrious list of ex-boyfriends next. Even before sort of settling down with the Strokes’ token hottie Fabrizio Moretti, Barrymore winked and giggled her way into the hearts of a wildly eccentric group of actors, musicians, comedians, sex tape vendors, drug addicts, directors and Firecrotch ranters. She’s aimed high (Leo), low (Feldman), and was an early member of the Lesbian Chic bandwagon. After the jump, we take a look at all her past paramours in order to narrow down our own suggested candidates for the next round.
America isn't the only one having a birthday this week. Last night, Lindsay Lohan — everyone's favorite freckle-faced, raspy-voiced, psychologically-damaged, naked-picture-taking, gossip-column-filling, potential-half-sister-having, secretly-lesbian actress — turned 22 years old. It's truly mind boggling to imagine she's that young. Lohan's got so many miles of bad road behind her that I pegged her for at least 35. But no, 22— only one year past the legal drinking age which she's certainly never adhered to. So, how did Linds celebrate this momentous occasion? By throwing an 80's-prom-themed bash at Teddy's in the Roosevelt Hotel, of course. Check in after the jump for more party deets than you can shake a stick at.
Until now, we had some troubles fully accepting Lindsay Lohan As Lesbian. Don't get us wrong. We are major fans of unicorn-straddling shoe fairies, C-list lesbian couples coming out, and someone finally putting food on Portia de Rossi's table every night. But we were fond of Lindsay's borderline feminist habit of having zipless fucks with every guy she found in bathrooms, overseas, or on her friends' arms. So seeing the freckly nudist settle down was easier to swallow knowing the "relationship" was likely a figment of our horny imaginations. But as these new pictures from the set of Labor Pains show, the girl on girl performance may be more real than we hoped. A closer look at Hollywood's happiest couple, and details on what's making Lindsay so smiley around her Smokey Bunch girlfriend, after the jump.
Naturally we couldn't ignore a blind item involving our favorite celebrity trend of the season, lesbian chic, that appeared in yesterday's NY Daily News. Especially when the item not only involves a starlet who dabbles in Lohan/Ronson-inspired games with the same sex, but also outs her bad boy boyfriend for helping her appear as straight as possible in the public eye. As the News asks today:
It's become clear that the one of the biggest trends of 2008 thus far is the emergence of lesbian chic. Girls can marry girls, starlets can publicly make out with their female roommates, and even though The L Word was canceled, its real-life L Word stars can still get it on with other lesbian cable stars. The two scissor-kick sisters in question? Well, one of our favorite indie actresses, Catherine Keener, has a little sister named Elizabeth, who starred in the Showtime series as Dawn Denbo. And while she's never publicly ‘fessed up to preferring ladies, those rumors have been an elephant in the collective lesbian community room for years. As for Keener's alleged makeout partner this past weekend, she's quite the opposite: she's loud and proud about being out. Details on Keener's game of tongue twister over the weekend, and who she played with, after the jump.