"Philly the Snowy Owl" Dies, As a Snowy Owl Invasion Is ReconsideredKen Layne · 01/30/14 05:01PM
When the huge invasion of snowy owls began this winter, was it wrong for us to feel delight? These beautiful raptors from the arctic tundra do not often show up on the American East Coast, after all. But the sheer number of snowy owls should have been a warning, both to the owls themselves and to our sense of wonder.
Snowy Owls Leave Arctic To Invade Frozen AmericaKen Layne · 01/09/14 01:59PM
In normal times, the arctic bird of prey known as the Snowy Owl stays up north, feasting upon the flesh of lemmings. But these are not normal times, so the owls have come south with the terrible arctic weather. "They are just absolutely everywhere and there's a lot more coming," says an expert who knows about the owls.
Huge Crazy Meteor Blows Up Over Western U.S.Ken Layne · 11/06/13 11:26PM
Home Invaded by Armed Robbers After Teen Girl Posts Photos of Money on FacebookNeetzan Zimmerman · 05/29/12 08:25AM
New York to Soon Be Overrun With Stink BugsRichard Lawson · 10/21/10 10:04AM
Toronto Film Festival Threatened by BedbugsRichard Lawson · 08/31/10 09:23AM
Ohio's Cities Are the Bedbuggiest In AmericaRichard Lawson · 08/24/10 03:29PM
Bedbugs Really Are Taking Over the CountryRichard Lawson · 07/28/10 10:21AM
Bedbugs Are Going to Destroy Us AllRichard Lawson · 07/22/10 11:18AM
Bedbugs Go Upmarket, Invade Abercrombie & FitchRichard Lawson · 07/02/10 03:49PM
Homeless Spiderwoman Descending From Ceiling Will Haunt Your DreamsMike Byhoff · 12/09/09 05:37PM
This Just In: Scarlett Johansson is a Teutonic Clone!ian spiegelman · 06/22/08 03:26PM
Here is an urgent letter and warning that just came through on our tips line. Sic throughout, natch. "Hello dear ladies and gentlemen!I would like inform you that Scarlett Johansson (actress) actually is a clone from original person, who has nothing with acting career. That clone was created illegally by using stolen biological material. Original person is very nice (not damn sexy), most important-CHRISTIAN young lady! I'll tell you guys more, that clones (it's not only one) made in GERMANY-world leader manufacturer of humans clones, it is in Ludwigshafen am Rhein, North Bavaria, Mr. Helmut Kohl home town. You can not even imaging the scale of the cloning activity. But warning!"
Obama Hires a Godless Commie!ian spiegelman · 04/27/08 12:21PM
Senator Barack Obama's "official blogger" has ties to the Communist Threat that could bring this nation to its very knees! "Sam Graham-Felsen, a journalist-on-leave from The Nation, joined 'Obama for America' in March 2007 where he works for the New Media department as the official blogger, daily presenting the campaign's public face. Now he's under fire for his reputed Marxist sympathies from bloggers at Common Ills on the left and Little Green Footballs on the right."
Rudy Will Protect America From New Yorkers, AliensPareene · 10/15/07 05:15PM
Rudy Giuliani has just about proved to America that he had what it took to rid New York of its many unpleasant ethnics and poor people, as the Times explained this weekend. Did you know that everyone in New York was on welfare before Giuliani became mayor? It's true! Every last one of them, except the good people of Staten Island, which is kind of the Iowa of New York. Back in the dark days of the early 1990s, "a New Yorker couldn't walk up Third Avenue without being on the lookout for muggers, of the blocks of dirty book stores and prostitutes, of public urination and pot-smoking." Christ, it sounds heavenly! (Though the public pot-smoking thing is a little west coast for our tastes.) But if there was one man who could be counted on to rid this city of its criminals and perverts, it was that adulterous cross-dressing megalomaniac. And he's gonna do for the rest of America what he did for New York: protect it from aliens.