Hedge Funds Lose Again 

Hamilton Nolan · 08/03/16 03:38PM

The realization that the retirement money of middle-class workers should not be invested in crazy expensive hedge funds is now hardening into conventional wisdom.

The Hedge Fund Candidate

Hamilton Nolan · 07/29/16 09:53AM

As we leave the “Feel-Good Personality Propaganda Celebration” period of the campaign and move into the part where we think about the stuff that may or may not actually get done, here is a relevant data point.

Donald Trump's Man on Wall Street Explains Himself

Hamilton Nolan · 06/20/16 10:05AM

If Donald Trump wants to win the presidency, he’ll need to raise a lot of money. One of the men helping him do that is the hedge fund manager Anthony Scaramucci. We asked him why.

Hamilton Nolan · 06/08/16 10:38AM

A recent survey of investors in hedge funds found that 94% of them expected their hedge funds to return at least 9% profits last year. The actual returns of hedge funds last year: -2%.

Chelsea Clinton's Husband Fucked Up

Ashley Feinberg · 05/11/16 12:35PM

Marc Mezvinsky, husband to Chelsea Clinton and occasionally successful hedge fund manager, thought it would be a good idea to bet on the Greek economy a few years ago. But unfortunately for him and the rest of his firm, it was not. Mr. Chelsea Clinton has fucked up.

Hedge Funds Have Sucked For a Decade

Hamilton Nolan · 02/22/16 06:02PM

Each and every hedge fund investor in the world believes that he is paying all that money to a hedge fund manager because he has one of the really good hedge funds. The reality is, most hedge fund investors are suckers.

Hamilton Nolan · 02/05/16 02:32PM

Life at the world’s largest hedge fund: “In an iPad app called ‘Dot Collector,’ employees weigh in on the direction of conversations while they are happening. Employees also are quizzed about the outcome of meetings. Any meeting of at least three people is expected to hold at least one poll.”

Hamilton Nolan · 01/26/16 05:51PM

“The 20 most profitable hedge funds for investors earned $15 billion last year while the rest of the industry collectively lost $99 billion.”

Hamilton Nolan · 10/01/15 11:30AM

Spruce Alpha, a hedge fund that recently collapsed after little more than a year in existence, attracted investors by noting that one of its managers “was a former researcher who had worked on simulations of laser defense missiles.” Wow. Laser defense missiles.

Study: Hedge Funds Don't Do Shit, Suck 

Hamilton Nolan · 08/17/15 03:08PM

Hedge funds—which, as an asset class, are a scam—charge exorbitant fees in exchange for the sort of top-tier investment skill you supposedly can’t get with a dirt cheap index fund. A new study says that is bullshit.

Austerity Is Coming For Your Kids

Hamilton Nolan · 07/28/15 09:33AM

Puerto Rico is facing an unsustainable level of debt. Its lenders, guardians of financial probity that they are, have come up with a solution: close schools.

Hamilton Nolan · 05/22/15 11:26AM

“One prominent investor...called the rhetoric ‘class warfare’ and noted other times in history, including before World War II, when financial speculators were unfairly blamed by politicians. ‘Instead of the Jews, it’s the hedge fund managers,’ the person said.”