A Florida man celebrating the Fourth of July with his friends and family on New Smyrna Beach noticed two middle-aged women trying to make off with his tent canopy, beach chairs, boogie boards, and kids' toys. So he confronted them, with a cameraphone, and got an unexpected fireworks show.
Look at this spectacular video of fireworks, sparklers, and contained explosives in all their slow-motion, fiery, explosive glory. Although, I harbor a seasonal pet peeve about setting off fireworks and sparklers during the daytime, this is really fantastic looking.
Independence Day is the worst of America's joyless national celebrations, the day when everyone will predictably act like a buffoon and nobody has the decency to Opt Out. From Park Slope to Silver Lake, from Phoenix to Saint Paul, the whole nation of grudge-laden bores will wrap themselves in the old Red, White and Blue in another futile attempt to out-patriot their enemies.
Tonight, the 35th annual Macy's Fourth of July fireworks display lit up New York City as 40,000 shells were fired off from half a dozen barges in the Hudson River. NBC aired the show live for those not in Manhattan. But because nobody watches NBC, here's video of the grand finale for your visual pleasure.
The America-hating buzzkills at the NYPD confiscated some 5,000 pounds of fireworks this year (everything "from sparklers to professional pyrotechnics"), leaving many New Yorkers without even the chance to injure themselves or set their apartments on fire. But at least the department had the decency to film the destruction, which took place yesterday in the Bronx. Next year, guys, maybe you can spring for HD? [NYT]
This weekend when you're setting off Roman candles and other such contraptions in the backyard, take a minute to stop and think of what the firework itself goes through on its flight. It soars in the air, explodes, and then crashes to earth. Let's show you!
Happy July Fifth! As you nurse your Independence Day hangover, take a minute to remember whose responsible for this in the first place. Presenting: Kids Reenact The American Revolution!