Prize Show Horse Found Slaughtered and Filleted on Florida Farm

Gabrielle Bluestone · 10/27/15 08:21AM

A prize show horse expected to compete in the Grand Prix this year met a gristly end this weekend when “professional” thieves stole him from his stall and carved him up in a nearby field leaving behind just a “ribcage, neck and head” for his owners to find.

"Yes, I Drank the Goat's Blood," Says Florida's Pagan, Libertarian, "Genius-Level" Senate Candidate

Jay Hathaway · 10/05/15 11:00AM

Augustus Sol Invictus, Floridian former lawyer and current Libertarian candidate for Senate, once described himself as “of genius intellect,” “God’s gift to humankind where the English language is concerned,” and “everything you ever wanted to be.” Critics describe him as “a self-proclaimed fascist” and “absolute insanity.” One time, he killed a goat and drank its blood.

Wily Raccoon Tricks Good-Natured Hippie Into Loving Her

Rich Juzwiak · 09/22/15 01:50PM

Say you’re a wild raccoon and you want to use the Precious Moments-esque saucer eyes you’ve been gifted with to trick a human into feeding you regularly. You could pick just anyone, or you could be efficient and choose a hippie who will let you walk all over her (or in this case, roll a stone over her glass door for sometimes hours at a time, causing physical damage to her property). What do you do? If you’re the wily motherfucker above, you go with the hippie and you roll your way to viral fame while eating the profits.

Florida Dogs Keep Cool

Brendan O'Connor · 09/20/15 03:15PM

“Beach goers enjoy a day floating with their dogs at Haulover Beach Park, Sunday, Sept. 20, 2015, in Miami Beach, Fla.,” the caption to this photo, taken by the Associated Press’ Wilfredo Lee, reads.