Crossfit Is a Plague

Hamilton Nolan · 12/10/14 02:50PM

Crossfit here. Crossfit there. Crossfit everywhere. Crossfit is the chicken pox of a new generation.

Burn Planet Fitness to the Ground

Hamilton Nolan · 03/20/14 11:59AM

Are you a member of the "Planet Fitness" gym chain? If so, we regret to inform you that your gym must be doused in gasoline and set alight immediately. Why? One poor, fit woman's tale should explain.

High Protein Diets Make You Look Good, Kill You

Hamilton Nolan · 03/11/14 10:35AM

Americans do not remember anything from chemistry or biology class, but they will damn sure buy anything that contains "protein," because I think it gives you muscles? Sadly, it appears that high protein diets may also cause you to die.

Act Like A Child, For Fitness

Dayna Evans · 01/25/14 12:30PM

Gawker's longtime disdain for SoulCycle's fiendish intensity, and all the evil that stationary biking harbors, may finally be coming to a triumphant end. A new fitness trend among urbane New Yorkers with golden-lined pockets, as the NY Times reports, is acting like you are a wittle, wittle baby. Classes have popped up among the pricier zip codes of Manhattan and Brooklyn to encourage the health-conscious to have a little juvenile fun while they sweat, using the long-dormant concept of "recess" as their marketing pillar.

Hamilton Nolan · 11/11/13 01:30PM

"Moscow city officials are now offering free rides on the subway to any passenger who does 30 squats before crossing the ticket barrier to enter the metro." Did America lose the Cold War after all?

Crossfit Is Super Libertarian, Cool

Hamilton Nolan · 10/02/13 03:17PM

Crossfit is an exercise program with pluses and minuses. On the plus side, it really will get you in good shape. On the minus side, its adherents sometimes resemble intolerably intense cultists, and also, it turns out, it's run by extreme libertarians who enjoy sharing pro-capitalist philosophies, to go with your squats.

'I Kept Thinking I Was Peeing?': Gawker Rides Bikes Underwater

Caity Weaver · 06/19/13 09:34AM

Biking in New York City is tired. Citi BikeSM takes up space on the street and a little bit of the sidewalk that was previously occupied by the street and a little bit of the sidewalk. They'll let any roving brood of vagrants into SoulCycle these days. Where can New Yorkers turn if they want to enjoy a stationary bike ride by candlelight but don't want to do that in an environment that can sustain a Mogwai's gentle magic?