Scott Stockert, a man from North Dakota who is known to himself as “Jesus Christ,” was arrested after police received a tip that he’d traveled to Washington, D.C. with the express purpose of kidnapping First Dog Bo Obama. A fact that is deeply embarrassing for the Obamas’ other dog—you know the one.
The Obama family trotted Bo out to an obedient press corps. "It's a little pressure here," our President said. The dog nervously whimpered and made a run for it, dragging Malia off toward Virginia.