Five Things to Pay Attention To Instead of Donald Trump's "Major Announcement" Tomorrow

Nell Jensen · 02/01/12 07:23PM

Uh-oh, guys: Donald Trump just tweeted that he will be making a "major announcement" tomorrow. Is he maniacally ridiculous enough to run as an independent candidate for President? Is he ending his awful reality show? (Is his show even still on? We stopped watching after they got rid of Omorosa.) Is he perhaps going to half-endorse a candidate just to copy Sarah Palin? Did he write a book of Ronald Reagan fan fiction? Oh well, no one cares. Every photon of limelight shed on this peripatetic gasbag contributes directly to the girth of his already morbidly obese ego. Seriously. Therefore, here is a list of five things cool or inconsequential things on the Internets for you to read about or watch tomorrow during his idiotic "announcement" whatever it is, because they are all more interesting than Donald Trump:

Monster Officially Created

Pareene · 02/06/08 10:11AM

That's our own beloved Julia Allison on the cover of Time Out New York. Holding out a cocktail napkin with her number on it! For the Singles Issue! It's like seeing Aleksey Vayner on the cover of Fortune. The Millionaires' Secrets To Making YouTM the Sexiest Brand on the Market!