What's the Most Annoying Possible Euphemism for 'Media Person?'

Hamilton Nolan · 02/02/12 05:19PM

Man, I remember when "Interactive Guru" seemed like the absolute most annoying possible euphemism for someone with a job vaguely related to the media. Seems like a long time ago. Then, of course, we got "Social Media Ninja" and "Knowledge Curator" and the whole thing just turned into an exasperating arms race of bullshit.

Chads Are the New Bros

Hamilton Nolan · 12/13/11 04:10PM

Many years from now, when you've settled down with a nice girl and stopped drinking the beer and being rowdy with the fellas and harassing bitches (but only the ones who wanted it), your young daughter, who was just perusing some old historical documents, will come to you and ask, with childlike wonder: "Daddy? What's a bro?"

Web 2.0 Etymology

Rebecca · 03/19/08 11:02AM

I've never used, or even felt anything approaching ZOMG until I heard that Facebook was launching a chat program. According to Wiktionary, ZOMG is an "overzealous typo of OMG, resulting from the proximity of z to the shift key." That sort of reminds me of the Facebook group, "I Prematurely Release The Shift Key!!1", whose members are "interested in earning big $$4."

Idiot Racists Proclaim "Canadian" Is the New "Nigger"

Joshua David Stein · 01/28/08 06:58AM

Dumbass American rednecks have finally caught on that racism and the use of ugly racist terms to call black people might no longer be palatable to the American ear. This presents a dilemma since for some white Southerners (and others), racism is bred into their bones. Hating minorities and verbalizing that hatred is as integral to their person as breathing or ignorance. To be prevented by societal mores and well, decency, from using words like "nigger" is akin to lopping off their mullets, a Samsonian emasculation. Thankfully they are also xenophobic so a quick linguistic fix wasn't that hard to find.

Is Being An Alpha Kitty About "Being A Better Wife And Cook For My Husband"?

Emily Gould · 09/26/07 11:30AM

"It's going to be a salon; I hope my apartment can be a place that Alpha Kitties, men and women who are interesting in New York, will want to come by, shoot videos together, and just hang out, figure out how to do interesting things together," former Seventeen editor Atoosa Rubenstein tells the Observer of her plans for the 3,007 square foot loft she and her financier husband just snagged for the bargain price of $3.07 million. Her salon will, of course, also double as a temple to the domestic arts: "I wanted to focus on building a home again," hence that comment about cooking for her DH. All of which begs the question: what the hell is an Alpha Kitty supposed to be, anyway? She's a businessperson, but she's a housewife! She's "men and women who are interesting in New York"? Wait... wasn't she was supposed to be a teenage girl? 'Toosing and turning in confusion, we did a little research.