Rogue Palin Won't Say Who She Voted For

Pareene · 11/04/08 12:16PM

Sarah Palin voted in Wasilla, Alaska. She took questions from the press, with her husband Todd. The press asked who she voted for, and she said, "I am also exercising my right to privacy and I don't have to tell anyone who I voted for, nobody does, and that's really cool about America, also." She wrote in "Sarah Palin 2012," obviously. Here's the clip! Watch it now! Ha, of course, upon re-watching, the question is about whether she voted for convicted felon Senator Ted Stevens, from Alaska. She won't say, of course, because she still has to go back to Alaska when she's done with this little vacation, and "Uncle Ted" is still a powerful figure, and she "stood up to corrupt old boy politics" by not even admitting that she probably still voted for him.

Newspapers Agree: Today is Election Day

Pareene · 11/04/08 12:01PM

There's a limited number of ways you can make "election day" a front page, above the fold headline. Because, you know, nothing will be "news" until tomorrow. So you can "report," as many papers do, that people will choose someone (YOU DECIDE, YOU CHOOSE, IT'S UP TO YOU), today, with a big splash featuring both candidates' headshots. You can try to make some actual "news," as the Times and the Wall Street Journal do with stories on how historic everything is and what the winner will inherit. You can report on all the boring campaigning of yesterday, or predict electoral chaos, or, as the New York Post admirably did, just pretend there isn't even an old white Republican in this race. The papers in the attached image chose almost exactly as you might predict. A couple papers across the world went a different direction.

Obama Election Day Photo Op Fail

Pareene · 11/04/08 09:45AM

According to Drudge, Barack Obama and his wife Michelle have taken "more than 15 minutes to vote." Maybe they're undecided? His link goes nowhere. Ben Smith doesn't report anything about how long it took Barack Obama to vote. Meanwhile: "HILLARY POLITICKING INSIDE NY POLLING AREA, ADVOCATES FOR OBAMA, 5 FEET FROM BOOTHS... DEVELOPING..." Once again, no link! But this is really a "fuck you, too late to not vote for me" move by the Obamas. Look who else voted at their polling place:

Hippie Corporations in Illegal Gifts-for-Votes Scam

Pareene · 11/03/08 10:32AM

Tomorrow is Election Day, the famous American Holiday in which people are not given a day off of work but are still expected to wait in lengthy lines outside elementary schools during business hours in order to have their provisional ballots thrown away or watch their electronic voting machines helpfully select the Constitution Party candidate. Yes, voting is hard, and seldom worth it. Which is why civic-minded companies are giving people prizes for voting! A voter an receive a free cup of coffee from Starbucks, a free donut from Krispy Kreme, and free ice cream from Ben & Jerry's if they show up and tell them they voted. It's a great, fun way to boost turnout, and it's probably totally illegal! The laws do vary from state to state, but for elections to federal office, our Congress is clear:

Happy Election Day!

Pareene · 11/06/07 03:35PM

Can you feel the magic in the air, New Yorkers? That's right, it's election day! In case you forgot to vote on your way into the office (as if!!) you have until 9 p.m. tonight to make your voice heard. You're registered, right? And you know where your poll site is, right? Good! Then all you have to do is make a couple informed decisions!