"Ain't Nobody's Business," Rihanna's duet with her abuser Chris Brown from her upcoming Unapologetic album, has leaked. It is an excellent pop song: sublime, clear, catchy. For its chorus, it interpolates (and slightly alters) an adlb from Michael Jackson's "The Way You Make Me Feel" for its chorus ("Ain't nobody's business but mine and my baby's"), but it's produced more in the style of Steve "Silk" Hurley's remix of Jackson's "Remember the Time." Produced by The-Dream and Los da Mystro, "Business" is a piano house number with a relaxed tempo and string shrieks, it manages to avoid EDM trappings (no drop anywhere to be found!), sounding classic and lovely. This will probably be massively popular, and impossible to ignore very, very soon. Rihanna and Chris Brown are reunited and it feels so cognitively dissonant.
Good god, ScarJo is not the only one. Zooey Deschanel, the HIP young "Almost Famous" actress (ha), has just released an album with M. Ward under the name "She & Him." Distressingly, it has already been called "one of the flat-out best pop records of the year" [VSL]. What shall we expect next, a Juliette Lewis duet with Joshua Redman for "best jazz combo of the year?" Chloe Sevigny teaming up with Smuckers to create the "best jam of the year?" It's all very disconcerting. Of course, no pop album will ever surpass Zooey's most famous musical work: her duets with Will Ferrell in "Elf." Stay in your lane, Hollywood! Highlight clips of her elfish singing, which we can only hope will thwart her musical ambitions, below.