If the grim news about our slow-cooking world has got you down, you might be an environmentalist. Recycling bins, hiking boots, and that reusable grocery bag you got at the farmer's market are other signs that you may have ecological beliefs and concerns. To the industrial propagandists, even your awareness of the hotter temperatures and horrific storms is proof that your green behavior is actually a religion. So what would happen if 10 million or 50 million religious environmentalists suddenly appeared on the national scene?
Further cause for existential despair in journalism: the (Pulitzer-Prize winning!) OC Register is going to outsource some of its copy editing and layout work to a company in India. But uh, don't worry staffers, it's only a test! A test which will inevitably lead to foreigners taking good old American journalism jobs. Don't be fooled by management doublespeak. It's time to panic!