You're Going to Feel Very Bad for So Long

Sam Biddle · 11/02/15 06:40PM

Jesus Christ. The sun went down at 4:51 today in New York. Oh my God. It might as well have never come up. That’s so bad—and get this: it’s not going to set after 5 p.m. until January 22nd. You’re in for a long, bad time. This is awful.

Is Environmentalism a Religion? Sure, Why Not!

Ken Layne · 10/11/13 10:15AM

If the grim news about our slow-cooking world has got you down, you might be an environmentalist. Recycling bins, hiking boots, and that reusable grocery bag you got at the farmer's market are other signs that you may have ecological beliefs and concerns. To the industrial propagandists, even your awareness of the hotter temperatures and horrific storms is proof that your green behavior is actually a religion. So what would happen if 10 million or 50 million religious environmentalists suddenly appeared on the national scene?

You'll Finally Get a Dollar, Just Before You Die

Hamilton Nolan · 05/19/10 02:54PM

The Way We Live Now: Engendering hopelessness in our best and brightest. Our youngest and strongest and most optimistic job candidates are the ones we crush first. Then the children. Then we give everything to the old, who soon croak.

Newspaper Outsourcing Comes To The OC

Hamilton Nolan · 06/25/08 12:46PM

Further cause for existential despair in journalism: the (Pulitzer-Prize winning!) OC Register is going to outsource some of its copy editing and layout work to a company in India. But uh, don't worry staffers, it's only a test! A test which will inevitably lead to foreigners taking good old American journalism jobs. Don't be fooled by management doublespeak. It's time to panic!