Here's your latest in identity politics and victimology: One day not quite three years ago, Thomas Klingenstein, a rich white man, found himself playing golf with Barry Mills, the president of Bowdoin College. They were reportedly discussing the state of higher education and Klingenstein, by his own account, told Mills that he believed today's colleges provide "too much celebration of racial and ethnic difference (particularly as it applies to blacks), and not enough celebration of our common American identity." After that encounter, Mills went on to tell the story in a convocation speech, without using Klingenstein's name, to describe the estrangement between contemporary conservatives and liberal academia.
Former New York Times editor Bill Keller has spent the past year pursuing a weird personal crusade against Wikileaks founder Julian Assange. He continues, weirdly, and to the detriment of his own reputation. Likewise, we shall continue our crusade against Bill Keller, until all of the world's readers have abandoned both of us, and we are merely talking to one another, like the cranks that we all are.
Cranky Old Man Who Really Has No Original or Insightful Ideas About The Internet or Media in General But Thinks He Does Because He Lived in a High-Powered Bubble For Many Years as NYT Editor and Now Nobody Will Tell Him That His Columns Are All Tedious and Pedestrian Bill Keller has written a snide response to all the snide tweets about the snide response to his last snide column about the internet that was itself not particularly new or interesting.
Momentously eyebrowed useless old crank Andy Rooney has finally said enough. Just a day after CBS announced that the befuddled nonagenarian would return to his slot on 60 Minutes next week, they're announcing that next week will be Rooney's last appearance on the show. He's been there since 1978. About fucking time.
Bill Keller, the T. Herman Zweibel of New York Times columnists, is back with another edition of "Former NYT Editor Bill Keller Reveals Himself to Be Little Better Than The Average Topeka Capital-Journal Weekly Lifestyle Columnist, in a Spectacle That's Embarrassing for Everyone Involved." Today: Bill Keller uses his enviable national media platform to shit on his own employees' books.
A while back, we learned of popular right wing hack and '80s relic Ben Stein's upcoming documentary, Expelled. It's about how all the secular Darwinist scientists persecute those people brave enough to speak made-up truths to power. Stein, whose training and expertise in the sciences is limited to a career of unrepentant bullshitting, wishes to give creationists, intelligent design advocates, and other various nutjobs their rightful place in the sun of academia. If you see his movie, though, don't review it.
From the mailbag: "some girl just had her purse stolen outside my window on 11th and A at 12:30am. there are so many loud teens in this neighborhood and drunk people at this time of night when she was screaming 'give it back fucker!' i didn't think anything of it until i looked out the window and realized what had happened, as she ran in her heels and continued screaming and running after the guy as he ran down towards avenue D. please post this. all of these rich girls and bankers really need to know they're still not safe over here. please move somewhere safer so the rents don't go any higher and landlords will stop harrassing rent stabilized tenants." You head the man, kids. Stop bugging the old people with your carrying-on and being victims of street crime at all hours!
We feel for Lamarr Watts. MySpace went and stole his idea for a magazine — get this — based on MySpace. The would-be entrepreneur tells us: