Crazy Rich Businessman Enacts Metaphor For America

John Cook · 05/20/11 03:47PM

Virginia restaurateur Henry Allen Fitzsimmons has hit upon a welfare plan the GOP can get behind: He sought out vulnerable young women who needed help and gave them money for education and childcare. All he asked in return was that they submit to being spanked, by him, on demand.

Should School Officials Maybe Stop Beating Kids?

Hamilton Nolan · 03/29/11 03:25PM

Did you know that in 20 hick states of our great union, it's still cool and A-OK for school officials to take your child into the dreaded "office" and administer stern thwacks to their bottom with some sort of wooden beating-stick, in order to teach them the difference between right and wrong (for example, violence is "wrong")? Yes, well. It is so. Might this be stupid?

Spanking Creates Stupid, Aggressive Kids

Max Read · 04/14/10 02:33AM

Scientists now say that frequent spanking can lead to aggressive behavior in children, so if you want Americans to continue running the world, spank away. As the Bible says: Spare the rod, create a weak, effeminate communist. [Time]