New Jersey Commuters, Prepare for Hell

Hamilton Nolan · 03/02/16 09:20AM

Chris Christie may be out of the presidential race, but soon he will get a chance to revel in the glory of plunging thousands of his state’s commuters into a living hell. It’s almost time for a transit strike!

Hamilton Nolan · 03/25/15 04:15PM

Since 2000, the number of jobs within commuting distance of an average American resident has fallen by 7%. Despite the fact that long commutes are one of the biggest barriers to human happiness, our commutes are getting longer. We are smart.

'I’m Certain More Than One Person Had Pissed Themselves': Every Straphanger's Worst Nightmare

Cord Jefferson · 02/01/13 04:25PM

On Wednesday night in Washington, D.C., the city's Metro green line, which connects its southern fringes to its northern extremities, up and stopped moving during rush hour after workers accidentally cut power to it while battling a fire. What ensued, according to one eyewitness account from a man named Scott, was a chaotic mass of thousands of sweaty bodies, vomit, urine, and panicked people smashing apart Metro cars in a desperate attempt to get fresh air (sic throughout):

Stephen Colbert Has Seen the Greatness of America and It is a Dude Popping Wheelies in the Lincoln Tunnel

Matt Toder · 04/05/12 11:09PM

On tonight's Colbert Report, Stephen Colbert told a personal story that elucidated everything that is right with America: on his way into work this morning, he captured a dude popping wheelies on his motor bike while driving through the Lincoln Tunnel. It's an amazing personal testament to all that is right with our fair nation and all that is dangerous about driving while shooting video with your iPhone.

Ads Are The New Subway Graffiti

Hamilton Nolan · 10/17/08 08:37AM

Just this week, I saw an NYC subway train plastered with ads on the outside of the cars for the first time, up close. And you know what? It's not that bad! Kind of new and exciting and eye-catching, like graffiti used to be, except less so. That sentiment will wear off within a week or so, and the ads will recede into the category of tiring visual assaults on our collective serenity. Too bad, because more and more and more are on the way, everywhere!: What else could they possibly sell for ad space on subways? Well, how many flat surfaces are there? —Panels in trains. —Billboards in stations. —Total wraps of the exteriors of subway cars —Stairs. —Turnstile structures. —Turnstile arms. —"Digital screens inside stations." —Digital projection ads on interior station walls. —"A large display, almost the size of a movie screen, mounted above a passageway by the 7 train in Times Square." —L.E.D. displays on the interior walls of subway tunnels that make the "windows light up as if there were a television screen outside the window." Commuters willing to sell forehead ad space, please contact the MTA. [NYT]

Microsoft kicks's spandex-clad butt in bicycling to work

Jackson West · 06/03/08 01:20PM

Microsoft employees have logged 2,605 days of riding their bikes to work, with an average commute of 19 miles in a day, since the start of the year in a contest sponsored by the Cascade Bicycle Education Foundation for organizations in the greater Seattle area. That's more than twice as many days and three times as many miles as employees, ranked eleventh behind even the lazy slackers who work in Seattle's municipal government and the academic wankers at the state university. How are Valley companies doing?