Thomas Friedman is a true American success story: a man who without any writing talent or deep understanding of any issue, managed to marry an heiress and now lives in a huge mansion. It’s called “capitalism,” folks.
Peggy Noonan, a keen scientist of the political sphere, once predicted Mitt Romney would defeat Barack Obama based on the fact that she saw a bunch of his yard signs. She brings the same eye for meaningless detail to the shores of Olde Englande.
Hamilton Nolan · 06/07/16 10:20AM
“If we talked as if people had souls, then we’d have a thick view of what is at stake in everyday activities,” writes David Brooks today. At this point he’s basically the nice old man with Alzheimer’s at church that everyone chooses to leave alone as long as he doesn’t hit anyone.
These times we live in—they are troubled, are they not? What hath the commoners wrought upon our noble republic, with this “Trump” whose gaudy habits offendeth the senses? Whose common voice shall explain to one and all the unknowable thoughts of the peasantry?
Peggy Noonan—white of skin, fair of hair, pure of heart. An American, a care bear, in the state of New Hampshire, alert. Whot doth Peggy espy approaching nigh? Lo—it is those whose skin is brown. Question them, we shall.
When the chips are down, and the transistors are shrinking, and the deadline hour is nigh, Thomas Friedman—a professional—can whip up a newspaper column faster than you can say “It is a shame that you are not writing for Highlights for Kids, sir.”
Here are the first lines of today’s column by the Washington Post’s Kathleen Parker, the real life version of a white character from The Help, in which she bemoans the present day profusion of “showoffs” who engage in “narcissistic indulgence.”
Frank Bruni, a professional newspaper columnist who—unfortunately, given his chosen profession—has not had a single good idea in the past five years, continues that proud streak today. In spectacular fashion!
David Brooks, the sad but harmless sweater-wearing divorced guy who likes to give your kids advice gleaned from inspirational office posters, is—astonishingly—still employed as a prestigious newspaper columnist.