If the Media Loses, So Do You

Hamilton Nolan · 10/29/15 10:10AM

After patriotism and religion, “attacking the media” is the most popular refuge of the scoundrel.

CNBC Host Uses Indian Accent, Makes 7-Eleven Joke

Lacey Donohue · 09/24/13 09:35PM

Early Friday morning on CNBC Squawk Box, host Joe Kernen had some really interesting things to say about rupees. Actually he didn’t, but that didn’t stop him from adopting an Indian accent while talking about the currency. When it was clear his co-hosts Becky Quick and Andrew Ross Sorkin were uncomfortable, he tried with all his might to hold back the hilarity on the tip of his tongue: “No, I can’t do it. I was going to say something.”

Justin Bieber Ain't Worried About His Baby Mama Drama

Brian Moylan · 11/23/11 12:20PM

Justin Bieber admits he took a DNA test to see if that baby is actually his. Angelina Jolie is into some kinky stuff. Britney Spears has a hard, hard life. Howard Stern thinks he and America both have talent. Wednesday's gossip is on the 4:07 to New Haven.

Billionaire: Fat Cats Are People, Too

John Cook · 11/22/11 12:52PM

Hey! Billionaires have feelings, too, you know. Home Depot co-founder Ken Langone took to CNBC this morning to defend their honor from that bully Barack Obama, who is killing the economy by refusing to literally dance for them while holding pom-poms made of shredded cash: "We need leadership, we need cheerleading, we need encouragement. Businessmen and fat cats need to feel like they're doing something good not that they're villains and not that their criminals."

Live: The CNBC GOP Presidential Debate

Jim Newell · 11/09/11 07:59PM

The presidential candidates have come to Michigan, to do a slick pagan money-sucking dance on CNBC in front of the citizens of one of the more screwed states in the country. It should be great! Oh, and now Tea Party patriarch Rick Santelli will be there, asking questions. Oof. So put some dollar bills in your collar, down a jug of Blue Label, and let's kill some poors — together.

Gilded CNBC Republican Debate Will Focus on How to End the 'War on Wealth'

Jim Newell · 11/04/11 03:25PM

Next week's presidential debate sounds fantastic: It's Republicans, on the rich people channel CNBC, while Wall Street protests are happening all around the country! And this promo from CNBC tells us that the main topic of discussion will be, "how will the candidates end the War on Wealth?" Yes, how? With extermination camps for the poor, or at least the uppity ones? That's the litmus test, candidates.

Rick Sanchez Is Sick of Having His Ass Blasted

Hamilton Nolan · 08/04/11 01:02PM

In your simmering Thursday media column: Rick Sanchez pipes up again, CNBC's bizarre PR scandal, James Risen's judicial defender speaks, News Corp is flooded with lawsuits, and the WaPo's punchy editor is retired.

Mitt Romney, Anti-Birther

Jim Newell · 04/13/11 11:23AM

Presidential candidate Mitt "Willard" Romney ceded tremendous ground to his main rival, pretend candidate and bloated carnival act Donald Trump, on CNBC yesterday, telling Larry Kudlow that he is not a Birther.

Tina Brown Can Still Have Any Writer She Wants

Hamilton Nolan · 01/31/11 01:11PM

In your stuffed Monday media column: Tina Brown is making power moves, Hearst is making Hachette employees nervous, a PBS show may get canceled, Phish fans invade the media, and The Atlantic Wire gets a new boss.