Millennials Too Cool for Gap but Love Walmart

Hamilton Nolan · 06/16/15 09:06AM

Boring person clothing store THE GAP, faced with falling sales, has announced that it will close 175 stores across America in a sad attempt to feel less unpopular. Who is responsible? Yes, it’s the dreaded millennials.

Science: Be a Slob

Hamilton Nolan · 03/18/14 11:02AM

Scientific research has now confirmed what has long been understood by those of us with the strength of character necessary to live life as raffish, devil-may-care iconoclasts: wearing "nice" clothes that are "appropriate" is for losers.

Stores That Sell Nothing Are the New Stores That Sell Something

Hamilton Nolan · 03/12/13 08:43AM

In the olden days, if you wanted to buy some pants, you'd go to the clothing store (which was the same as the hardware store, and the pharmacy) and pick out some god damn pants, and buy them, and take them home. Now, thanks to wonders of technology, we live in a time when it is possible to go to the clothing store, pick out some god damn pants, and not buy them, because sir—sir?—I'm afraid those aren't for sale.

Are Spanx Good or Evil?

Caity Weaver and Hamilton Nolan · 02/13/13 04:15PM

This morning, two intrepid Gawker journalists traveled all the way to Midtown Manhattan to peruse the new fall Fashion Week showcase of Spanx, the body-squeezing clothing-and-undergarment line for women—and men. Having done our research, we now ask: Are Spanx good, or evil?

AFL-CIO Tells Non-Union Store 'Unionmade' to Stop With the 'Unionmade' Crap

Hamilton Nolan · 11/30/12 01:15PM

Earlier this month we told you about Unionmade, the upscale San Francisco menswear store that sells expensive clothes that are not, in fact, union made. The cherry on top of that particular style-over-substance outrage was the fact that Unionmade's logo bears a suspicious resemblance to the logo of the AFL-CIO. And now, the AFL-CIO's lawyers have sent them an angry letter demanding they change their name and logo.

Mormon College Objects to Skinny Jeans

Maureen O'Connor · 12/06/11 06:00PM

Updated. The first time I read this, I thought it was parody: Independent Brigham Young University publication The Student Review reports that BYU-Idaho has banned skinny jeans as part of its honor code guidelines against "form-fitting clothing." Skinny jeans: trousers of the devil? Don't tell Mitt Romney.

Filming of New Rihanna Video Halted After Irish Farmer Objects

Max Read · 09/27/11 06:12PM

For some reason, Rihanna is filming a new video in a field in County Down, Northern Ireland. Or, she was, until the farmer who owns the field asked her to stop. "I wish no ill will against Rihanna and her friends. Perhaps they could acquaint themselves with a greater God," he told the BBC.

Gay Couple Denied Entry to Gay Icon's Theme Park

Lauri Apple · 07/27/11 05:26PM

Given that legendary country and western singer Dolly Parton's a vocal supporter of gay marriage, you might think that gays who visit her theme park in Tennessee would be welcomed with open arms. Not so, as one lesbian couple recently experienced.

The President Needs Pants That Fit Where the 'Nuts Hang'

Max Read · 01/17/11 08:45PM

Forty-seven years ago, President Lyndon B. Johnson needed pants. Pants that fit him better—as he put it—"where my nuts hang... back to my bunghole." Luckily, the phone call where he ordered those pants was recorded. For posterity.

The Ultimate Hoodie For Nerds Has Algorithms In Every Stitch

Dan Grappone · 10/13/10 04:24PM

Watch this video outlining the creation of the DARPA hoodie, which is made with the help of advanced military applications. These tech nerds have figured out a way to make a hoodie with a computer? Mind blowing stuff, inside.

Penis and Ass Enhancing Underwear to Hit British Store Shelves Next Week

Jeff Neumann · 10/09/10 12:13PM

British clothing chain Marks & Spencer has waded into the dong-enhancement game with its new Bodymax line of "frontal enhancement" underwear. They'll make your dick look 38 percent bigger! M&S also offers butt-lifting undies made of "cool, odour resistant fabric."

Meet the World's Most Efficient Packer

Matt Cherette · 09/16/10 01:15PM

Meet Tommy. Tommy knows how to pack a bag! And in case you didn't believe me (or him), watch this video of him packing a crapload of clothes into a 22" REI Stratocruiser carry-on backpack/suitcase, using his mom's foolproof method.