The High Cost of Looking Low Class

Louis Peitzman · 04/22/12 02:33PM

Yesterday I posted a link to $525 paint-splattered shoes — you, too, can look like a manual laborer. But this was also a call for submissions: what is the most expensive apparel you can buy to make yourself look poor? Here are some of the most egregious items you sent in.

Your Best April Fool's Day Prank Stories

Louis Peitzman · 04/01/12 10:04AM

It's April Fool's Day, which means you've probably already been tricked into believing something amazing and then mocked for your gullibility. Isn't this fun? But for those who want to live vicariously through other people's pranking, here's a collection of reader submissions sent in following my appeal on Friday.

Submit Your Best April Fool's Day Prank Stories

Louis Peitzman · 03/30/12 03:05PM

Depending on how much you enjoy making an ass of others (or having an ass made of you), April Fool's Day can be a sacred holiday. There are those who have elevated pranking to an art form: gone are the days when you could simply swap the salt and sugar, or fake a teen pregnancy.

Now That You've Been Laid-Off, What Will Your New Job Be?

Richard Lawson · 11/20/08 11:45AM

Everyone's getting laid-off these days, what with the economy and all, and now we want to know what you'll be doing for money while the dust settles. There aren't any media jobs left and desperate times call for desperate measures. Depressing stories have already been trickling in, like the two longtime Jersey Star-Ledger newsroom employees who, after refusing a buyout, were banished to the mailroom! Or the Longmont, CO, Times Call staff who were invited to be valet parking attendants for their (probably soon-to-be ex) boss's fancy Christmas party. And, perhaps worst, a Hachette memo to staff inviting them to participate in the saddest thing of all, a holiday crafts fair. You know, so they can practice a trade before they inevitably get canned! "You will have the opportunity to show or sell your craft such as jewelry, accessories, chocolates, knitting and crocheting," it says. Sigh. Send us your post-axing, new job tales (depressing or not!) and we'll publish some of our favorites in the coming dark days. In the meantime, read the full dismaying Hachette memo after the jump.

It's The "Absurd Financial Product Some Rich Person Actually Bought" Contest!

Moe · 09/19/08 01:24PM

Well look, the market is up again, how (pardon me) UTTERLY FUCKING RETARDED. What this means: another huge plunge is invariably in sight! Because the government achieved this by outlawing short-selling temporarily on all the big stocks you'd want to short, and what the hell are hedge funds supposed to do about that? Gawker tipsters all over financeland are predicting a protracted bloodbath over the next couple months as investors sign up to get their money out of hedge funds. Dozens could go bust. But hey, here is a silver lining: hedge funds are for rich people! (Well, not anymore, now that America is running the world's biggest hedge fund with our tax dollars.) But hedge funds used to be for only the rich, and with your help we can illustrate how rich people are stupid. Inspired by this story about an insane Merrill Lynch investment vehicle called NORMA one expert quoted in the Wall Street Journal called "a tangled hairball of risk", I'm holding the Awful Vodkas I Have Drank of the plutocracy, an "Absurd Financial Product Some Rich Person Actually Bought" contest. I asked one of our tipstering financiers about the most retarded investment vehicle he'd ever seen.