Wall Gives Birth to Half-Nude Human Man Who Reportedly Smelled Soup

Andy Cush · 02/18/15 02:27PM

What the hell is going on this video? First we see an adult human ass peeking through a hole in a wall, so perfectly chiseled that you wonder for a moment whether it doesn't belong to a department-store mannequin. Then the mallets come out, and the men start swinging.

Pippa Middleton's Butt Doesn't Approve of Kim Kardashian's Nude Pics

Allie Jones · 12/11/14 10:32AM

Failed party planner Pippa Middleton crawled out of her sister's dungeon yesterday long enough to cry "scuse me, did somebody say butts?" In a very rude column for The Spectator, Pips wrote about Kim Kardashian's ass, because, I guess, Pippa herself wore a butt to a wedding that one time.

Don't Hate Kim Kardashian. She's Just a Butt.

Leah Finnegan · 11/21/14 02:15PM

I really like Kim Kardashian. I usually have nothing but disdain for celebrities, or celebrities in training. There is not a thing less interesting, or useful in the world, than an "artist" of dubious talent who has risen to fleeting fame because of sex connections, family connections, or money connections. But I think Kim is great. Here's why: She asks nothing of her fans. She's not all like: Download my new .mp3! Or: Sit through my new three-hour movie about the end of earth and how we all have to eat corn now! She hawks no talent. She knows what her best asset is, and she plays it up. She has a truly remarkable butt, so she showed it naked on the cover of Paper. Why go through the trouble of being a "singer" or an "actress" when you can just be a butt? Kim knows.

Kim Kardashian Ass-Shamed By Naya Rivera: "You're Someone's Mother"

Allie Jones · 11/12/14 08:39AM

Noted Kim Kardashian wannabe Naya Rivera (of Glee "fame") possibly trashed Kim on Instagram last night because eh, who knows. She pulled the Mom Card. If screenshots are to be believed, Naya commented this on Kim's pic of her naked Paper cover:

J. Lo Made Iggy Azalea Wear a Dirty Swimsuit

Caity Weaver · 09/19/14 01:10PM

As the Summer of Butts fades into golden autumn, a Bronx-born single mother has released her own "viral" butt YouTube in the hopes of capitalizing on a trend sweeping the nation like a butt abruptly dropped very low and skimmed lightly over a dance floor (or regular floor).

Butts [VIDEO]

Rich Juzwiak · 08/20/14 09:54AM

There is no "take"; there are only butts.

Toilet Paper Brands Like Cottonelle Are Cheating Your Ass

Hamilton Nolan · 07/25/13 09:28AM

"Slow your roll," American booty-wipers: have you been feeling a bit light in the tush, lately? You sure have. Because Big Toilet Paper is engaged in a systematic program of giving you less for your money.

Male Craigslist “Perv” Seeks Female Hipster To Moon Him for Cash

Camille Dodero · 07/24/13 01:03PM

It's a Tuesday night in late July. New York City's bones feel hollow. Even the Internet is running dry. You tried Williamsburg, but the women all seem to be away, off somewhere you can't see, in bikinis. So what's a thirtysomething East Village man—one with an extremely specific urge involving star tattoos and chunky glasses and a playfully defiant glimpse of a tauntingly bare "female hipster" ass—supposed to do?