Floppy-Dicked Haters Kick Erect Man Out of Naked Bike Ride

Jay Hathaway · 06/01/15 02:05PM

The World Naked Bike Ride, which is exactly what it sounds like, came to Kent, U.K., over the weekend, and the participants had barely got their kits off before organizers ejected a bloke for popping a stiffy.

Could This Be the First Hard Openly Gay Dick in the NFL?

Jay Hathaway · 02/26/14 04:49PM

Michael Sam, the first openly gay football player likely to make an NFL team, has a penis. And some people believe that his penis became erect at this week's NFL Scouting Combine, that there is photographic evidence of said openly gay erect penis, and that this is somehow a "nightmare" for the NFL.

That U.S. Olympic Rower's Cock Is Not Giant: A Photoanalysis

John Cook · 08/07/12 12:36PM

To the settle the matter of the Olympic boner that wasn't: First, American rower Henrik Rummel was celebrated for appearing to have a "giant boner" after he won the bronze. Then, on Reddit, he demurred, claiming that the sculpted outline visible through his rower's shorts was actually his flaccid, unerect member. This revelation prompted some august personages—including former Gawker editor Choire Sicha and current Gawker editor A.J. Daulerio—to pronounce Rummel's cock really big, if that's what it looks like during the off-season. This is hogwash. Here's proof that Rummel's cock is just a regular old cock.

Boner-Boosting Condoms Coming Soon

Jeff Neumann · 04/20/11 06:35AM

Oh, condoms. They're the bane of a horny man's existence, and can sometimes make it hard to keep a raging boner going. They're also pretty necessary. But regulators in Europe are said to be close to approving the very sexy-sounding CSD500 — basically a condom dipped in boner gel Zanifil®, thereby producing some fun results:

This Is Not a Man Having a Boner for Ke$ha

Maureen O'Connor · 03/15/11 05:38PM

Ke$ha did not cause this man's penis to flop out of his rainbow swim trunks on a beach in Australia. Click the image to enlarge this rare photograph, which gets more SFW when you zoom in. The phallic illusion will disappear before your eyes! Which is perhaps why Ke$ha looks so perplexed.

Study: Boner Pills Lead to More STDs

Jeff Neumann · 07/06/10 05:02AM

In a study released today in the Annals of Internal Medicine, doctors found that men who take pills for erectile dysfunction (Viagra, Cialis) showed triple the rate of STDs than men who don't. This newfound prowess leads to riskier sex.

RJ Berger's Boner is Not Duct Tape Proof

Andrew Tatreau-Sherwood · 06/22/10 10:46AM

RJ auditions for the school play—a West Side Story-meets-Twilight mash-up—to get closer to Jenny. RJ is known to have a giant ...muscle, and during the climactic kiss his beastly member unleashes upon the audience. Hilarious humiliation after link.

In Touch Don't Know Brentwood

Richard Lawson · 06/05/09 04:03PM

High-end celebrity weekly In Touch ran a feature this week showing where various celebs live in the tony Brentwood section of LA. They even have a handy map. Only problem? The map is of a different Brentwood, up in Oakland.

Martin Bashir Tells Crowd About His Boner

Hamilton Nolan · 08/01/08 01:54PM

When the Asian American Journalists association announced that ABC's Nightline host Martin Bashir would be the keynote speaker at its July 25 Gala, the group's executive director said "We're excited to have Martin this year who is — so to speak —one of our own." It's true, because deep down the cancer-stricken Michael Jackson interviewer Bashir is just like you: A dude who wants to bone all of the women in his general vicinity, and is not afraid to go into detail about the causes of his erection on stage in front of a large crowd: