Don't Even Think of Throwing a Subway Party

Brian Moylan · 08/10/11 01:42PM

When the subway pulls into your station, you never know what you're going to find. You might end up sitting next to a passed out junkie in a wheelchair, you might get stuck on the dreaded "stinky car," or, worst of all, there might be a bunch of tacky assholes who took over the train with their party.

We've Already Found the Worst New Show of the Fall Season

Brian Moylan · 08/09/11 05:07PM

The worst show of the new season is on ABC and is called Work It. It is unbelievably horrible. Even the 90-second trailer is too long to tolerate. This thing puts Cop Rock, Viva Laughlin!, and even That Show With Heather Graham that Got Canceled After One Episode to shame. Behold!

Katy Perry Is a Comedic Actress Now

Richard Lawson · 06/08/11 09:20AM

Fried candy pop act Katy Perry, already a hilarious musical comedienne with ribald and tasteful songs like "Ur So Gay" (in which she says she hopes an ex-boyfriend hangs himself with his faggy scarf), has now entered the realm of funny acting with a new video.

Is This the End of the World?

Richard Lawson · 01/05/11 04:15PM

The new year has arrived and it is awful, what with bird/fish/crab death, floods, freezing temperatures, and zombie ex-Vice Presidents. So let's just put it all out there and list the reasons why this is already the worst year ever.

Smoking's Harm Exaggerated Unnecessarily

Hamilton Nolan · 02/17/10 05:09PM

"Every cigarette you smoke can take years off your life," says this ghostly new anti-smoking ad. Technically that's a lie. But if it were true, smoking would be awful! More so. Click through to watch this counterproductive tricknology. [via Adfreak]

Spanx: Still Lurking Out There

Hamilton Nolan · 11/05/09 12:48PM

Women across America continue to wear "Spanx" and "Spanx"-like undergarments despite the fact that "Spanx" are clearly evil, most especially for the women wearing them, and whoever may be around when it's time for them to shed their "Spanx."

Brüno Headline Writers Leave No Gay Cliché Unturned

Richard Lawson · 07/13/09 09:23AM

Yes, gay movie Brüno made 30 million gay dollars at the gay box office this weekend, and headline writers just couldn't wait to write snappy little things about sashaying and topping! Clearly the point of the movie was not missed.

Fat Men + Skinny Jeans= Salvation

Hamilton Nolan · 07/06/09 11:56AM

The Way We Live Now: Emasculated. Figuratively, as The Man gives us a few extra pennies in Welfare even as cops yank our falafel-cart permit; and literally, because the fashion industry must sell skinny jeans until all balls are crushed.