Four people were killed in a car crash in Astoria, Queens on Friday night. The group had been driving back from a birthday celebration when their car hit a curb and flipped into the East River. Two men and two women were pulled from Steinway Creek after being trapped in the car for more than half an hour.
Facebook, the online agora for hipsters and bigots, shepherds and faeries, is also—duh!—a tool of political organization! Like this group of 20-somethings from Fordham University who are steamed as hell that hipsters are invading Astoria! There's Greeks in them there hills and they don't want them smoked out by "flamboyant hipsters... turning our churches, cafes and hang outs into wasteful art exhibits!" The group is run by a group of Greeks, though, as the Daily News notes, "other Greeks distanced themselves from the group's call for battle against long-haired music lovers." After all, were not Calliope, Euterpe and Polyhymnia long-haired music lovers themselves?
At long last the saga of Astoria roommate-hunters Emily and Michelle is coming to its crushing conclusion. And at the same time, another volume in their Rabelaisian lives is being written. Good news! Emily and Michelle have finally found a roommate. According to Emily (or Michelle, we don't know which one is which):
Guess what? Perpetual Craigslist-questers for a roommate, Emily and Michelle, are throwing another party in Astoria! Remember the last one? It kinda both worked and didn't work all at the same time. I loved the part when someone does an acoustic version of Wonderwall! Anyway, this party is a pajama one and it is at niner. This Sat. Update: After receiving this invitation, we got an email from Emily: "Wait!" it said, "wW just googled sic transit gloria, and we take the flyer back." Sad! Though I guess we've been uninvited, you should still go! It'll be fun!
We thought for sure the crazy/cuddly/cathartic antics of Astoria's belles du jour Emily and Michelle would result in someone, anyone, taking up their offer to move in with them in their four bedroom apartment . They even threw a potluck! They even sang songs! They even have A DOUGLAS! Everyone wants a Douglas! Imagine our sadness and, quite frankly, disappointment upon seeing receiving hearing that the room was still unoccupied.
This video of Emily and Michelle's potluck dinner for potential roommates will be the primary source material regarding what it meant to be alive in New York in the first decade of this century. Sociologists of the future will be as confused about why eight people actually came to the random potluck in Astoria—people who answered an ad for a roommate on Craigslist and suddenly found themselves sitting on a couch listening to Emily freestyle on her acoustic guitar. Only later on will the people of the future think to question what "Wonderwall" might have meant. (Quality disclaimer: We certainly did not shoot this video. Nor have we ever met these people.)
Emily and Michelle happened into our life at the right moment. We met them just the other day through Craigslist, where they wondered aloud why no one would live with them in their Astoria apartment. They threw a potluck dinner for potential renters and one potential renter, Peter W. Knox sent us a report. Now we hear what really went down from Emily and Michelle themselves.
Ah! Someone named Peter W Knox actually went to Emily and Michelle's Totally Awesome Astoria Potluck and lived to blog about it: "There was a lot of drinking (they keep pasta sauce right on top of their ice cube trays in ziploc bags, which is why the ice tasted funny), and the girls laughed a lot and rolled around on the floor. They had met each other six years ago at a Halloween party that they had both attended dressed up as prostitutes, Emily going as far as to paint dried semen on her face, a moment captured on camera and displayed with pride." Amazing.
Last week we met Emily and Michelle, two young ladies living in Astoria who posted on Craigslist that they couldn't figure out why their roommates kept on dropping like flies. Was it the condoms on the dining room table, or that a potential roomie was advised not to "pretend to be cool when we look through all the papers in your room and know you're on probation and use a weird contraceptive gel"? We think it's because everyone is afraid of how they are completely awesome. And on Saturday, Emily and Michelle hosted a potluck for a few of the more than 4,000 responses they say that they got. The invitation follows. If you attended, we would like to hear from you. Special bonus! Emily and Michelle themselves will be providing blow by blow later!
Nope. Too late. If you don't have plans already, there's no chance you'll end up anywhere tonight that doesn't involve Plan B and a watery Bloody Mary in the morning. If you do have plans, well, they probably mostly suck and/or require trekking to outer Brooklyn. Better start preparing the Monday-morning revisionism now. Ahh, sunny weekend blues! The Internet was supposed to make despondency better, and it has: after the jump, ridiculous things the melancholics on Craigslist will do tonight and tell themselves was fun tomorrow.