Madonna Was Artistically Raped by Hackers

Gabrielle Bluestone · 12/18/14 09:00PM

The worst part of Madonna's leaked album full of shitty singles had to be her outraged statement, released the next day, decrying her artistic rape at the hands of terrorists.

Former Secretary of Commerce John Bryson Tests Positive for Ambien, Avoids Charges

Taylor Berman · 07/03/12 06:01PM

Former Commerce Secretary John Bryson's blood tested positive for Ambien after Bryson was involved in two separate hit and run incidents (including one in which he crashed into the same car twice) in Los Angeles in early June. Prosecutors declined to press charges, stating that the amount of Ambien was consistent with the "low end of therapeutic levels," which makes it impossible for criminologists to prove that Bryson was under the influence.

The Pill-Popper's Guide to the Apocalypse

Matt Harvey · 05/27/10 12:09PM

Oil leaks, terror attacks, earthquakes, volcanic ash: It's no wonder you're feeling antsy, can't sleep, and every time a loud bang goes off your heart starts racing. We asked two psychiatrists which drugs to take best ease the psychic pain.

Tiger Woods Needs to Talk to Sanofi-Aventis

cityfile · 12/04/09 01:02PM

Tiger Woods' major sponsors have been standing by him. But if any of them do part ways with the golfer over his extra-marital dalliances, there's probably a pharmaceutical endorsement deal that could be his. According to a report this morning, Woods and Rachel Uchitel were fond of taking Ambien before getting down and dirty. "You know you have crazier sex on Ambien," Uchitel reportedly told a friend. "You get into that Ambien haze. We have crazy Ambien sex." [Radar]

Sleep-Emailing: Your New Polite Excuse

cityfile · 12/18/08 10:26AM

Feeling a little socially overextended over the next couple of weeks? You can always blame your Ambien prescription for accepting that email invitation to your friend's cousin's Christmas party. One woman says that after increasing her dose, she "received a puzzling phone call from a friend who said she was accepting her dinner invitation," one that she couldn't remember extending. The woman's friend then pointed out that she'd sent the invite by e-mail the night before, although she had no recollection of ever sending it. We're thinking this could also work for denying all knowledge of/responsibility for drunk dialing. [ABC]

Bad Taste Update

Pareene · 01/23/08 06:29PM

In light of Heath Ledger's tragic death—which might or might not have been related in some fashion to prescription sleep aids!—Paramount Public Relations would be more than happy to arrange an interview with one of a certain health website's many experts in Holistic Sleep Aid Solutions! Blast email attached.

Crossing the Line: Will We or Won't We?

abalk2 · 11/30/06 05:00PM

An earlier post where we wondered whether or not we should provide a suicidal reader precise information as to how many Ambien one needs to take to finally draw down the curtain on this life provoked some interesting responses. Mostly, you don't want us to have any fun. A sampling of the responses we received can be found after the jump, along with our final decision as to dispensing the advice in question. See you on the other side.

Crossing the Line: Gawker Suicide Service

abalk2 · 11/30/06 02:00PM

We're not afraid to be servicey here at Gawker: We're all about bringing our readers important information that they might not be able to obtain in their otherwise busy lives. Certain requests for illumination, however, put us in an odd place, ethics-wise. Take the following query:

Al Goldstein Off the Lithium, Cunnilingus

Chris Mohney · 11/30/06 11:40AM

I'm not very optimistic. I mean, do you want me to be like Pangloss and say that this is the best of all possible worlds? I gave up the lithium and I'm trying to stay alive, but I have enough Ambien to kill myself.