Steven Tyler once sang, “Pink it’s my new obsession, pink it’s not even a question.” How wrong he was. A pink UFO was allegedly spotted hovering above the International Space Station in footage shot by NASA last week. A moment after the pink spot appears, NASA’s live stream cuts out. The nerve of NASA is astounding.
Louis C.K. has a feeling he's discovered "the origin of the basic despair that we all feel in the pit of our being, that one thing we all share." And it's not, as he previously posited, the knowledge that each of us will be forever empty and alone. It's that Earth is a Martian graveyard, and we're all "seeded by marsian corpse DNA."
Three days ago in New York City, dozens of bared breasts and half as many women marched from Columbus Circle to Bryant Park, accompanied by a coterie of similarly topless men. The occasion—International Go Topless Day—was marked by eager press coverage in the New York Post and elsewhere. Very little of it mentioned aliens or UFOs—despite the fact that International Go Topless Day was created and is sponsored by one of the world's largest alien-worshipping UFO cults.
Last week, creationist minister Ken Ham responded to a NASA astronomer's estimate that "in the next 20 years we will find out we are not alone in the universe" by declaring the search for extraterrestrials "pointless" because they're all going to hell anyway. Neil DeGrasse Tyson, astronomical badass, went on Real Time With Bill Maher Friday to offer a well-reasoned counterpoint.
Ken Ham, the young-Earth creationist minister who had his ass gently-but-firmly handed to him in a debate with Bill Nye earlier this year, has had it with "the desperate and fruitless search for extraterrestrial life." Aliens can't be real, because the Bible says Earth is special. And if they are real, they're all going to hell.
An insane half-hour interview transpired recently when rapper Charles Hamilton walked by a spot on Harlem's 125th Street where someone was filming for the YouTube channel SaNeter.TV. Hamilton was apparently flagged down and had a lot to say about Sonic the Hedgehog, Interscope president Jimmy Iovine, Kanye West, Drake, and homosexuality.
For much of today, the people of Earth have had their gaze transfixed on the most majestic vaulted ceiling of all: the sky. At around 9:20 a.m. Friday (local time), a giant fireball crashed into Russia. At around 2:20 p.m. EST, an asteroid did not come close to hitting Earth even though, in a deep, dark corner of their hearts, everyone was hoping it would because life can just be so exhausting sometimes.
After an area weirdo sent Denver's Fox-affiliated TV station KDVR footage of UFO sightings over the Mile High City, the channel's news team decided to send out one of its photojournalists to the scene in an attempt to "verify" the video (i.e. debunk it and move on).