Courtney Love scares Lindsay Lohan straight. Zoe Saldana gets "hot and heavy" with Bradley Cooper. A Kourtney Kardashian wedding is "imminent." Kristin Cavallari gets re-engaged. Do as Thursday gossip says, not as it did in the '90s.
Lindsay's 17-year-old sister has seen her "boobs, ass, and vag." Kim Kardashian's reality show literally tried to cast her husband. Jason Sudeikis is dating an Olsen, but which one? Thursday gossip is sisterly.
Why did Kris Humphries ditch his wedding ring to carry moving boxes? Shiloh Jolie-Pitt and Kingston Rossdale might be in love. Dina Lohan is shopping a memoir. Kanye's Occupy Wall Street outfit was worth more than $30,000. TGIFriday gossip.
Elisabetta Canalis discusses her break-up with Clooney. Chris Brown gets out of 95 parking tickets. Ali Lohan didn't get plastic surgery, might have gotten an eating disorder. Matt Damon envies Jake Gyllenhaal's head. TGIFriday gossip.
Simon Cowell fondly recalls a successful date with "wacko" Denise Richards. Did Lady Gaga hook up with a tween idol? Madonna defends her right to hate hydrangeas. What did Ali Lohan do to her face? Thursday gossip has questions.
Reggie Bush texts Kim incessantly, begging her ditch Kris at the altar. George Clooney's female wrestler lover sleeps over. Angelina dodges rioters in London. Ali Lohan is officially more bankable than Lindsay. Wednesday gossip is the one that got away.
Lindsay Lohan throws her weight around a parking lot and says she is a ballerina. Chris Brown's latest temper tantrum includes the phrase "faggot ass." Captain America drove Chris Evans into therapy. Wednesday gossip is kind of a big deal.
Chris Brown explains the emergence of a naked self-portrait: "Girls be reckless." Lindsay Lohan goes clubbing in New York. For the price of 15 minutes with a high-end hooker, you can now meet Charlie Sheen. TGIFriday gossip.
Lindsay Lohan hyperventilates and calls the paparazzi "animals." Someone is selling a sex tape of Usher. Charlie Sheen misses his son's birthday party. Britney Spears reunites with K-Fed at her son's baseball game. Monday gossip sucks and blows.
A government clerk has been charged with improperly accessing computerized passport data on hundreds of celebrities and their families. Lindsay Lohan's sister Ali had her information compromised, and the family is up in arms.
LiLo was "giggling" and downing Jack and Coke when she admitted to using drugs. Lady Gaga's meat dress gets made into jerky. Britney Spears buys a skateboard for her sons. Thursday gossip is totally saturated.
Lady Gaga crowd surfs in pasties and fishnet, and gets licked. Dina Lohan plans a family garage sale. Katy Perry's new song is about how bad her ex-boyfriend was in bed. Monday gossip is orally fixated.
Oksana and Mel's troubles began at an Australian placenta ceremony. Lawyers bug Lindsay Lohan to testify about her strip search. Zac Efron blows $2000 on booze and strippers. Heidi Montag is missing. Wednesday gossip is a hot mess.
Lindsay's family gets special permission to visit on a week day. A photograph of Mel Gibson's possibly abused baby surfaces. Britney Spears is possibly on Team Mel. Katy Perry floats in a cloud of cotton candy. Thursday gossip is tentative.
In her moment of need, LiLo looked to her mother, and her mother called a camera crew. Mel Gibson's ex says he knocked her teeth out with his fist. Chris Brown cried in public. Don't call Monday gossip a comeback.
[Ali Lohan inspects a flashlight with sister Lindsay at Rite-Aid, where they bought office supplies and a copy of Vanity Fair. Note Lindsay's Mickey Mouse shirt. Are Disney mice a new theme for her? Images via X17online.com.]
Praise be the gods of tabloid: Brad Pitt's chin scraggle of horror is gone. Lindsay Lohan's paid appearances are increasingly desperate. Joe Jackson blames his wife for Michael's death. Monday gossip starts the week with a clean slate.
She's divorcing Jesse and will raise the baby alone. Larry King is a swinger. Lindsay blames a tawdry lie on her dad, who blames Perez Hilton. Courtney Love says Gavin cheated on Gwen with her. Wednesday's gossip cometh.