Nobody Wanna Watch Your Wack Video Ad

Hamilton Nolan · 05/08/15 09:00AM

The internet is full of “video ads” that some highly paid corporate marketing officer paid tons of money to some advertising firm to produce. Nobody is watching that shit.

Ads, Editorial, It's All #Content

Hamilton Nolan · 02/16/15 12:11PM

Even in the deep dark depths of the Great Magazine Die-Off a half-decade ago, struggling print magazines did not get so desperate as to breezily stick ads on the cover of their struggling print editions. Hey, times have changed.

McDonald's Is America's Most Cynical Corporation

Hamilton Nolan · 02/02/15 11:46AM

McDonald's, the molded plastic king of America's molded plastic cuisine, has decided that money will no longer suffice to purchase its meager offerings; the company now demands that you degrade yourself in order to be fed.

Hamilton Nolan · 12/22/14 01:45PM

Axe body spray's new White Label line is targeting a more mature and refined class of virgins. "White Label products aim to help make men seem famous with such unusual fragrance notes as praline, star fruit, moss, fig and ginger."

Soon Every Brand Will Have a Smell

Hamilton Nolan · 12/09/14 09:30AM

Sure, the techniques that brands use to advertise themselves have reached Minority Report levels of dystopian profiling and intrusiveness. But are they intrusive enough? Aren't there any more of your senses that advertisers can exploit for their own nefarious ends?