Claire Carusillo is a features writer at Gawker.

Lilibet Is Back In the Saddle

Giddy up girl

cough cough i'm sick

Prince Charles Accepted Suitcases Full of Cash from Qatar's PM

But nothing illegal was going down, Clarence House says

deal or no deal

Guiliani Narrowly Escapes With His Life Following a Light Pat on the Back

If he hadn't been in such good shape, he might've been murdered

what's up, scumbag?

Ezra Miller's Vermont Farm Is Not the Refuge You May Be Picturing

It's got guns, bullets, weed, and now three children

genuinely concerned

Is It Moving? William and Kate Unveil Haunting New Portrait

They made a deal with the devil—worth it


Nepo Baby Queen Elizabeth Uses Her Privilege to Meet Australian Pol

Something most of us could only dream of doing

East of Eton

Now That's Queen Shit: She's Selling Sticks

For £55 a pop, you too can be Stick Girl

mission accomplished

Oh, My Cakes! Little Prince G Made Cakes

And he sold them to support African wildlife

sticky lil fingers

Consumerism Reports: The $129.99 Barf-Preventing Bracelet

It's shockingly effective

shocking news

Prince William to Celebrate English Bar Mitzvah

It's when you turn 40 and the Queen throws you a party

King Wombat

What Is Adele's Last Name?

A "Dear Prudence" acolyte writes in about his fiancée, niece to a “notorious criminal”

adele dazeem?

Prince William Is Culling the Monarchy of Racists and Alleged Pedophiles

Someone call the PC police and the regular police

Uncle Problems

Bully for Her? We'll Never Know if Meghan Markle Was a Palace Menace

The Palace has sealed off the results of their inquiry into the Duchess's behavior, despite their promise to publish findings


Meghan Markle Pi$$ed Over Nixed Lilibet Photo-Op

Life's "unfair"


Mental Health Crusader Kate Middleton Psychologically Tortures Prince Harry

That's actually so typical of her

me achin' noggin

Check Out Will and Kate's New Pleasure Palace

It’s a royal dump

grace and favor

10 Essential Gifts for Dad

The most important man in your life deserves a $40 bee

"daddy" -sylvia plath

Pervy Prince Andrew is Mounting a Comeback

And dry-humping a teddy bear, I’d bet

garter martyr

Outlaws Harry and Meghan Arrive at Granny's "Last Chance Saloon"

And the Queen's mad enough to swallow a horn toad backwards.

new hat opportunity

Prince Harry Falls Off Horse and Straight Into David Foster's Arms

He's a "father figure" to the prince

foster care