“Archetypes With Meghan” Is Done Mourning

Not even the death of a sovereign can stop this contractual obligation

Cara Delevingne and Margot Robbie Involved in Confusing Incident With Paparazzo

The duo allegedly fled Buenos Aires after the photographer’s arm ended up broken

'Bros' Was Set Up to Fail

A baffling marketing campaign pitched it as homework for straight people — somehow it didn't work.

King Charles Looking Like a Dime On New Coin

All jowls and ears? That's king shit.

Why Can't My Dog Just Pee on the Tree?

(To be clear he's still going to)

Queen's Official Cause of Death Exactly What We Feared

Muick the corgi is cooperating with Scotland Yard

Meghan and Harry Victims of Royal Family Cybercrime

They've been demoted to Prince Andrew level on the Crown’s official web page

The Definitive Timeline of Jojo Siwa's Controversial New Relationship

TikTok is watching and screaming and throwing up

The Queen Bitchslapped Meghan Markle Over Alleged Wedding Egg Fit

Was Duchy Organic CEO King Charles there?

Harry Panicking That He Talked Too Much Shit About the Queen In His Memoir

It’s a little late, man

It's Montecito State Prison for Harry, If Charles Has Anything to do With It

The new king is hellbent on keeping Harry exiled

Bin the Book, Save the Empire

Prince Harry needs to burn his memoir manuscript if he ever wants to hang out at Balmoral ever again

Taylor Swift's Getting Funnier

A new TikTok persona emerges from the ashes of her adorkability

Meghan Markle Reached Out to King Charles to Ask for a 1:1

She tried to book a meeting room at Windsor HQ to “clear the air”

BBC Blocks Meghan Markle With Big Candle During Funeral Livecast

The flame of monarchy will not be extinguished

Queerbaiting? Royals Cry Over Dead Queen

They're two and eight (that's Cockney slang for "upset")

Queen Buried With Broken Stick

That'll be nice for her

Little Charlotte is coming for the crown

The laser-focused third grader is playing the long game.

Malibu Barbie Paytas-Hacmon Is My Newest Baby Baby

Welcome to content creation, lil' doll!

British Kiss Arses Wait In 30-Hour Line to See Queen's Coffin

It isn't even an open casket