Paul Ryan Vows To Continue Depressing Ritual of Sleeping on a Cot in His Office
Sen. Paul Ryan, the newly-elected Speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives, will not let the new title go to his head. He will not be moving over to the the Speaker’s office in the Capitol, he will not stop his daily buns and guns, and he certainly will not start sleeping in a real bed in a real home during the work week.
During an interview with CNN’s State of the Union on Sunday, Ryan first gave an unsettling look at the painstaking doldrums of his daily life.
“So I live in Janesville, Wisconsin. I commute back and forth every week. I just work here. I don’t live here. So i get up very early in the morning. I work out. I work ‘til about 11:30 at night. I go to bed and I do the same thing the next day.”
Next, Ryan made the admission that not only has he been sleeping in a cot (a lightweight portable bed that youngest children and guests are often forced to sleep on), in his office in the past — he promised he will to continue to lay his head on the creaking springs of a cot for many years to come.
“It actually makes me more efficient. I can actually get more work done by sleeping on a cot in my office, and I’m going to keep doing it.”
Now, imagine Paul Ryan, the man who is second in the United States presidential line of succession, curled up alone in a dark office on a sagging metal cot, with streaks of dappled moonlight shining across his face, his eyes wide open and staring into the darkness.