Hordes of sleepy Australian cameramen and rumpled Russian news anchors will have a great orgy in the streets of London tonight, for the Duchess of Cambridge has finally given birth to the Cookie Monster that has been growing inside her like a parasite for the better part of a year: a healthy baby boy.

Royal baby trading card stats:
Time of birth: 4:24 p.m. BST
Weight: 8 lbs., 6 oz.
Baby: Baby

Here is a screenshot of the official birth announcement placed on an easel outside Buckingham Palace:

And here is a loonytoon dressed like a town crier who read a proclamation in front of the hospital, expressing his desire that the baby be "happy and glorious":

We will update this post with more information as it becomes available.

[Art by Jim Cooke; Images via Telegraph live feed, AP]