“Although coifs and comestibles would not seem to have much in common, for a specific demographic, a cappuccino made with locally roasted, ethically grown beans is a natural accompaniment to high-caliber haircuts.”

If that sentence does not make your skin crawl in a viscerally discomforting way, then you can work for the New York Times Style section.

[Pic: Instagram]

Contact the author at Hamilton@Gawker.com.