Bad yogurt company Chobani, whose product is to “Greek yogurt” what fermented urine is to champagne, has stooped to an outrageous, sexy new low in trying to distract the public from the taste of its pasty goo.

Chobani’s latest commercial is purportedly an ode to “LGBT acceptance” and the “inclusive” nature of a brand that is “embracing natural ingredients and a simplistic lifestyle.”

Yeah right.

It is plain as day to see that Chobani, desperate to align itself with any image other than “maker of America’s worst cow-related product,” has plunged directly to the bottom of the barrel, enlisting hot naked lesbians lounging around in their birthday suits in a last-gasp effort to make you, the easily seduced consumer, believe that bad yogurt is “sexy.”

While it is true that Chobani yogurt appears to have the taste and consistency of semen, explicitly trying to associate the two substances is a dubious marketing strategy.

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