A country club wedding in a Buffalo suburb devolved into an enormous melee that required police officers from seven different agencies to respond, the Buffalo News reports. Hours after the happy couple exchanged their vows, one witness told the newspaper, family members were screaming that they hated each other, punching holes in the walls, and splattering the dance floor with one another's blood.
"Things were said that can never be taken back," one witness told the newspaper. Hey! It's like a metaphor for marriage!
Local authorities seem to have had trouble pinpointing the cause of the ruckus, which began sometime shortly after the reception ended at 11 p.m. Lt. Patrick Fitzgerald of the Orchard Park Police Department, where the fight happened, told the paper that the police had been called to the Orchard Park Country Club earlier in the night to respond to a separate, smaller incident: a wedding guest was accused of groping a woman and was punched in the face.
The puncher was escorted out of the party, and all was well for about 45 minutes, when a fight ensued that seemingly involved everyone in the wedding party. Police officers responding to "multiple 911 calls" from the venue found a large group, at least 100 people by one local TV station's estimate, fighting in the parking lot. They called in reinforcements from four surrounding towns as well as the Erie County Sheriff's Office and the State Police. EMS workers treated several injured people, including one man who was taken to the hospital with a head injury. No one was arrested, because police simply weren't sure who was responsible.
Good weddings have been evolving into better fisticuffs all over the country this month. In a strikingly similar case just a couple weeks back, a Pittsburgh groom went to jail after hitting on a pregnant lady at his own reception and then trying to fight her boyfriend.
This has been your nightly reminder that love is a lie and pepper spray is an essential accessory for the well-prepared wedding-goer.
[Image via Orchard Park Country Club]