I bring you illicit news from across the pond. Please understand that what I have to tell you is disturbing, but that within the Gawker news organization we feel its importance outweighs its unpleasantness. Yes, while this troublesome activity is for now limited to those in the land of lorries, there is no indication that it will remain there in exclusivity. We must remain vigilant against inappropriate foreign influence. We must remain aware.
The lads are dunking their balls.
Yes, ahead of a … cricket championship, or something, in the United Arab Emirates, the England cricket team is dunking its balls. David Willey, a “seamer,” (Wikipedia says: “Seam bowling is a bowling technique in cricket whereby the ball is deliberately bowled on to its seam, to cause a random deviation when the ball bounces. Practitioners are known as seam bowlers or seamers”) spoke to the BBC about what the team was doing to anticipate the UAE’s humid conditions, which — and please understand that I do not share this detail lightly — make balls wet, and harder to grip.
"It is never going to be perfect, but there are things we can put into place,” Willey told the BBC. “Even if it is just dunking balls in buckets and catching, fielding, bowling with wet balls.”
Disturbing. Unsettling. Troublesome. Other synonyms for “disturbing.” The BBC notes that dew becomes a factor in evening matches, adding to the balls’ moistness, which makes it “difficult for spinners in particular.” I have no doubt.
"We're probably getting some more towels on the way for the lads that are heavy sweaters,” Willey added.