With the 2016 Olympics fast approaching in Brazil, a huge stink been made about Rio’s sewage-infested waters, which authorities now admit won’t be cleaned up in time for the games. “Wouldn’t that be nice,” say residents of the Brazilian port of Barcarena, whose beaches are currently covered with thousands of dead, rotting cow carcasses.
The cowtastrophe reportedly began last week when a freighter ship carrying 5,000 cattle sank, drowning most of the animals and spilling hundreds of gallons of fuel into the Amazon. The gory details, via the Washington Post:
What happened next is like something, well, out of a Gabriel García Márquez novel. Local residents pulled dead animals out of the river, loading them on carts and dragging some of them home through the dusty streets tied to their bumpers. It was a feast of free beef.
But since then, the partly submerged ship has been spitting out the rest of the herd, fouling the town with a horrific stomach-turning stench. Carcasses that didn’t wash downriver have floated to the surface and lodged along the docks and riverbanks, putrefying in the tropical sun.
Let’s just do a salad for lunch, actually.