BuzzFeed News got its mitts on Will Smith’s new memoir WILL and an incredible headline emerged:
Will Smith Revealed He Once Developed A “Psychosomatic Reaction” To Orgasms After Engaging In “Rampant Sexual Intercourse” To Deal With Being Cheated On By His First Girlfriend
(Lest we forget another banger of a BuzzFeed headline about WILL earlier this month: “Will Smith Said He Once Considered Killing His Father to Avenge His Mother After Years of Violence and Thought He Could ‘Easily Get Away With It’ Because He’s ‘One of the Best Actors in the World’”)
According to this latest excerpt of WILL, Will “Hot Lil Oedipus” Smith claims that after his first love cheated on him at age sixteen, “I had sex with so many women, and it was so constitutionally disagreeable to the core of my being, that I developed a psychosomatic reaction to having an orgasm.” He describes this time in his life as going “full ghetto hyena” mode, which leaves a lot of questions I just have to trust will be satisfactorily answered in the full text of his memoir.
“In every case, though, I hoped to God this beautiful stranger would be ‘the one’ who would love me, who would make this pain go away. But invariably, there I was, retching and wretched. And the look in the eyes of the women even further deepened my agony,” he wrote.
That’s right, the executive producer of the gritty Fresh Prince of Bel Air reboot Bel Air, at one point was puking and immobile as a result of having so much sex with women. I’d tell him to take it to the Red Table ASAP, but I am sure his wife and children are sick of hearing about this. I don’t even know that much about Will Smith, but I have read enough magazines to know that he’s been crying out for help for years. Compiled and bound in WILL, a devastating pattern seems to emerge.
Just a few weeks ago, People excerpted part of WILL where wrote that he fell in love with gay icon Stockard Channing while filming the 1993 film Six Degrees of Separation. He had “raging jealousy” that Tupac Shakur knew his wife Jada Pinkett before he did. In an October episode of Red Table Talk, Jada, according to E!, “tells Gwyneth Paltrow Why It’s So Hard to Maintain a Sex Life with Will Smith.” The duo always claim their marriage is modern, “grown” (not “open”) and unconventional, but with the frequency these two are publicly discussing it, they seem pretty miserable to me.
He claims a Trinidadian tantric sex healer saved him from the sex-induced vomiting (only after he lit his first girlfriends’ possessions on fire and made her watch), but I do wonder if maybe he should go back for a tune-up. The excerpted contents of this memoir still reveal a man who cannot stop purging.