The darkest days of the COVID-19 pandemic were hard for everyone, but they were particularly hard for the Real Housewives. They had to carry their own luggage, for example. They had to clean their own houses, and sometimes drive their own cars. Their lavish parties were downgraded to lavish outdoor-only parties featuring just other cast members as guests. Devastatingly, they had to make their own meals.
And we had to watch.
Filming during the quarantine days of the pandemic often necessitated the cast holing up together at someone’s vacation house or rental. In a notable string of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills episodes, that meant staying at Kyle Richards’s La Quinta estate, where Kyle was the designated chef, and where no one except Sutton could read the LA Times exposée about Erika Girardi and her attorney husband’s misuse of money that was designated for plane crash victims. (The rest of the ladies couldn’t read it because it was too long.)
There, the group dined on what had become unfortunate quarantine staples: Kyle’s famous sloppy lasagna and large wooden bowls of romaine lettuce. (These then turned into disgusting plates of old food covered in bugs because the ladies were also unable to have people there to clean up after them.)
The next morning, Lisa Rinna didn’t know how to make coffee.
Kyle was also the designated chef during a group trip to Lake Tahoe, where she attempted to make salmon and set off the fire alarm.
“It’s not blackened, this is … burnt fish,” said Erika, regarding the fish. Seems right.
The ladies, too, struggled with making their own cocktails, with Kyle, mid-salmon preparation, plaintively asking cast member Crystal if she knew how to make a margarita. “Do you know how to make a margarita?” she asked, assuming the answer would be no. “Yeah,” said Crystal. “You DO?” said Kyle, aghast. “I mean, I don’t know how to make a margarita, so I don’t know.” “Yeah, easy,” said Crystal. (When Crystal presented her with the finished margarita Kyle said, “That’s good, I’m impressed … And I’m a tough critic ‘cause I’m married to a Mexican.”) (WE KNOW.)
But this month’s return of the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills has marked, blessedly, a return of the many staff members that keep the little Housewife lives moving along in a way that is not very unpleasant to behold due to overall incompetence. Last night, in an episode mostly about a flippant comment from two episodes ago that Sutton has already apologized for multiple times, the group returned to Kyle’s La Quinta estate. And so did their personal chefs.
Thank god. The pandemic may not be over, but at least we no longer have to watch Real Housewives attempt to make their own disgusting dinner. And that’s not nothing.