Kate Middleton’s Gone Nucking Futs
And the royal insiders are loving it
There is something so powerful about a woman deciding that she’s done with all the bullshit expectations placed upon her. When a woman decides to finally be herself, there is nothing that can stop her. Think of Jane Fonda going to Vietnam, or Emma Stone no longer dying her hair that deep shade of red.
Kate Middleton is joining the ranks of these boss mamas, according to a People exclusive. Royal biographer Sarah Gristwood told the tabloid that the Duchess of Cambridge is starting to “share a bit more” in her role as one of the most visible (and definitely alive) royals.
"She's done it carefully enough to be relatable — nothing that would cause controversy and nothing that could be considered oversharing,” Gristwood said. That is royal speak for: “She is letting her freak flag fly, safely.”
So what does it look like when a future Queen stops being polite and starts getting real? Well, it is actually still very polite. People highlighted the fact that Middleton recently went down a slide at the LEGO Foundation Playlab and said in front of the press that her son, George, has practiced his rugby tackle on her.
A “royal insider” told the magazine that Kate "comes across exactly as she is: a grounded, smart human being. Watch her in action. She is damn good at it." That is exactly what I thought when I read about her being pretty chill when a cheesemonger didn’t call her “Your Royal Highness.” Ditto when she got hoisted into the air by a rugby team. I thought to myself, “That chica is being so zany, but I will also respect her immensely when she takes over the British Empire as Queen Consort.”
My only advice to Kate is: Girl, let’s get even crazier. Wear a pair of denim cutoffs when you go to the Caribbean to celebrate the jubbly. Cast off those sensible kitten heels and let your piggies breathe. Go dancing past 8 p.m. Drink one too many piña coladas and tell something really personal to a stranger in the hot tub. Maybe get some funky braids! Let go of the royal airs and really embrace fun, flirty freedom.