Kate and William, those ever-loving and eternal Cambridges, both 40 and unfortunately at peak hotness, got double Dorian Grayed yesterday. Per the Daily Mail, the future king and Kate continued their birthday blitz PR tour with a stop at the University of Cambridge’s Fitzwilliam Museum to see their new joint portrait, painted by Jamie Coreth, pictured with his Faustian work below.
Hey, hey, now that’s quite a cracking good likeness! Kate stuns in a dress by The Vampire’s Wife (a coded message?!) and a pair of Manolo Blahniks that Carrie wore in blue at her wedding and then when she failed to resuscitate Big in the shower (okay, we get it!). William’s in whatever. He’s doing the Angelina Jolie leg and looking towards the future, or maybe the past. The expression on their faces convey a shared but internal contentment amid a backdrop of a global pandemic, recession, and parliamentary infighting. They’re calm. They won’t ever age like the rest of their family, or British people in general.
How did they react to the portrait, though? Everyone, including this work of statuary, needs to know.
Well, they’re thinking they look good.
Kate can’t help but look back at it.
They’re laughing, possibly maniacally. They’ve pulled the damn thing off. They’ve made deals with the devil before (the Queen), but never before has a royal lived forever. Maybe William’s great-great-great-great-great-great aunt Catherine the Great for the horse thing, but that was in infamy.