After 96 years on this planet, the Queen lost her battle with time this afternoon at Balmoral Castle. It’s a sad day for royalists, Gawker’s royals correspondent Claire Carusillo, and probably Peter Morgan. It is impressive to hold on for 96 years (especially when you have to talk to Prince Charles all the time), but the Queen could not have picked a worse time to kick the bucket. There is so much good stuff coming down the cultural pike! Here’s a list of just a few of the things Lilibet Sr. will have to find a way to enjoy in whichever part of the great beyond she happens to find herself:
Avatar: The Way of Water
Kate Winslet, one of Liz’s beloved subjects, held her breath underwater for seven minutes just so that the Queen would never know if this movie meets expectations? Not worth it if you ask me.
The Margaret Cho Episode of Archetypes with Meghan
I know the Queen is rueing the fact that she couldn’t have held on for one week longer to listen to this one. She was really looking forward to hearing a potty-mouth comedian and her least favorite granddaughter-in-law discuss the concept of the “Dragon Lady.”
All the Other Netflix and Spotify Projects in the Works from Harry and Meghan
To be fair, no one else will be seeing those anytime soon either.
The Visuals for Renaissance
And she had just learned how to do the TikTok dance for “Cuff It.”
Liz Truss’s Reign as Prime Minister
Truss was one of the final people Queen Lil saw in person, and to her credit she said “that’s enough.”
Prince Charles Reign as King of England
In this climate?
Midnights by Taylor Swift
What a sad thought: The Queen will never hear any of Swift’s new songs playing from another room on Prince George’s iPad. I’m sure Swift, an Anglophile to such a degree that she’s been dating a Brit for years, is devastated.
Don’t Worry Darling’s Theatrical Release
She was #TeamMissFlo.
Season Five of The Crown
The Queen will not get to see Elizabeth Debicki as Princess Diana.
Ben Smith’s new website for internationally minded college graduates is launching in a matter of weeks.
James Corden’s Last Late Late Show Episode
Technically this is happening next year, but it’s too tragic not to include. Hopefully Prince Phillip has already preset the DVR.
She didn’t even realize she had eaten her last figgy pudding. :(