Today John Boehner told Martha Raddatz, host of ABC's "This Week," that he "can't imagine" himself ever supporting gay marriage, even after Senator Portman's high-profile reversal on the issue.

MARTHA RADDATZ: Can you imagine yourself in a situation where you reversed your decision, as Portman has, on gay marriage if a child of yours or someone you love told you they were gay?

SPEAKER JOHN BOEHNER: Listen, I believe that marriage is the union of one man and one woman. All right. It's what I grew up with. It's what I believe. It's what my church teaches me. And I can't imagine that position would ever change.

Did you know? There are actually a lot of things John Boehner can't imagine, such as:

  • A duck and a cat who are friends
  • Having a normal sized body but tiny, tiny hands
  • That Spring Breakers could possibly live up to the hype
  • Dying, like really dying, and not being alive, like forever though
  • What traffic lights looks like if you're color blind
  • A peanut butter cup that has dark chocolate instead of milk chocolate on the outside
  • How they make that fake sugar that goes in sugarless gum
  • Being a fighter pilot, or a majestic reindeer
  • What happens to Atreyu at the end of the Neverending Story
  • Why it's called the Neverending Story in the first place
  • Having kids who move out of the house and don't mooch off of your family talk plan or steal your Netflix password, Christ, it is nine dollars a month and you sure seemed to have enough money for that ridiculous destination wedding to Vietnam for that friend you don't even talk to that much anymore
  • Horses that can talk
  • What everyday life must have been like in Colonial Williamsburg even after taking the tour

[Image via AP]