Finally, an Occupy Wall Street protestor has clawed back money from the banks. Sort of. You may remember Stacey Hessler, the Florida mother of four who became a bogeyman for conservatives after she "abandoned" her family to join the Occupy protests. The New York Post is reporting today that Hessler has divorced her husband Curtiss (sic), in the process netting an $85,000 settlement, though he did get to keep that extra "s."

Professional protester Stacey Hessler is legally splitting from her hubby, Curtiss, but not before waltzing off with a portfolio that includes cash and his 401(k) retirement fund, filled with stocks and other instruments of American capitalism.

The divorce settlement, filed Oct. 16, awards Occu-Mom the $79,585 fund and a $5,800 bank account. Her total take: $85,385.

The filing lists Curtiss' occupation as banker and says he earns $65,000 a year. Her job is listed in court papers as "protester" and her employer as "Occupy Wall Street." Annual salary: $0.

Divorce papers cite "irreconcilable differences" for the split, saying the 19-year marriage "is irretrievably broken."

The Post, predictably enraged at this small showing of personal freedom, chastises Hessler throughout the piece for doing things like kissing other men and sleeping outside. Hessler told the Post that she didn't regret her choice because, "Military people leave their families all the time, so why should I feel bad? I'm fighting for a better world."

Lost in the shuffle was a marriage between a dreadlocked woman and a Bank of America financial advisor, who retained the house and custody of the couple's four children. A modern American fairytale.

[via New York Post]