The public relations industry is much like the vagina: not very good at writing. This is PR Dummies. Putting the you-know-what in the you-know-where, at least once a week.

This is not a bad press release because it is about vaginas. The care and upkeep of vaginas is, as the reporter who forwarded us this pitch noted, a "perfectly legitimate consumer topic for half the world's population." (And of at least passing interest to much of the other half, as well.) It is a bad press release because of the sheer number of times it says "hoohoo."

The stylistic lowercasing of the word only serves to draw further attention to it. Bolding ours:

From: [PR Dummy]
Subject: PERSONAL CARE PITCH: Vaginal Health & Hygiene Tips by Stacy Lyon, Founder of healthy hoohoo® Feminine Hygienic Products

Hi and I hope this finds you well,

For your women's health/personal health features, please consider the below winter vaginal health and hygiene tips including how to avoid winter dryness or extreme perspiration along with avoiding dehydration during holiday imbibing from healthy hoohoo® – a line of feminine hygienic cleansers free of parabens – founder Stacy Lyon.

Below, please find basic information on healthy hoohoo and then, scroll down for Stacy's tips:

Line of feminine hygienic cleansers created by a woman for women of all ages
Free of parabens, fragrance and sulfates
Formulated with a blend of botanical extracts and ingredients that are pH balanced
Gives the right amount of cleansing and moisturizing
Created after founder Stacy Lyon studied the dangers of parabens after a friend's breast cancer tumor biopsy came back with an alarmingly high concentration of the harsh preservatives (paraben)

Vaginal dryness is an issue for most women during the winter months, due to wearing more clothing and heavier fabrics. Think about those long days of wearing undergarments, pantyhose and a wool skirt for more than 10 hours? Most women can experience extreme dryness or extreme perspiration, which will result in vaginal discomfort or worse, a breeding ground for bacteria.

The average American participates in up to 10 holiday entertaining events between October to January. Increased alcohol consumption can lead to dehydration, which contributes to vaginal dryness and sugar-laden, confectionery goods can cause yeast overgrowth!

Stacy Lyon suggests the following tips on keeping your vagina healthy during the cool-weather season:

Wear cotton, breathable undergarments (colorless)
Professional women: limit your use of pantyhose - think sexy instead and use a garter belt with stockings!
Limit the number of times you wear body–hugging garments per week, switch your clothing options from leggings or skinny jeans to a loose skirt or slacks to allow the area to "breathe"
Cleanse the area with cleansing wipes as much as twice a day to keep pH levels balanced
Limit refined flour, sugar-filled and processed foods to 2 times per week
Eat yogurt – it's rich in lactobacilli, the beneficial bacteria that fend-off the bad stuff
Try adding some raw garlic to your diet – it's a strong anti-fungal

**Stacy Lyon is available to discuss more tips upon your request**

healthy hoohoo is a new line of feminine hygienic cleansers created by a woman, for women of all ages. Revolutionary in its simplicity and free of harsh chemicals and fragrances, healthy hoohoo Gentle Feminine Wash ($12.99), healthy hoohoo Gentle Feminine Foaming Cleanser ($13.99) and healthy hoohoo gentle feminine wipes (single .95/10-pack $4.79) are designed to naturally restore the pH of a woman's vaginal environment.
Founder Stacy Lyon could not find a super mild feminine cleanser and thus went to work to create healthy hoohoo. She began to study the dangers of parabens after a friend's breast cancer tumor biopsy came back with an alarmingly high concentration of paraben. Prior to her informing Stacy of this harmful preservative, she had never heard of it. This is what drove the inspiration for healthy hoohoo.
"I believe that less is more and that harsh chemicals belong nowhere near the vulvovaginal region," states Stacy. healthy hoohoo was designed with to simply allow a women's body to naturally hit the "reset" button. By avoiding over-washing and harsh cleansers, women who have been using healthy hoohoo are reporting improved moisture, comfort and odor conditions.

The line helps bring balance to the mucosal membranes by maintaining the proper pH environment for lactobacilli strains which act as barrier to harmful bacterium.

Several well-intentioned soaps, cleansers and wipes actually strip away some of the balanced goodness Mother Nature put down there to keep a woman's body in harmony. Realizing those cleansers were filled with parabens (synthetic preservatives), fragrance and sulfates (harsh chemicals that make easy lathering possible), Stacy saw the need for a healthier alternative in the marketplace. She worked with a formulation chemist to create something simple, mild and better.

healthy hoohoo's high standards gave rise to a blend of botanical extracts and ingredients that are pH balanced and provide just the right amount of cleansing with just the right amount of moisturizing. When it comes to feminine cleansing, "less is more," so hoohoo's formula liberates the body to do what it needs to do. The vagina, after all, is a self-cleaning oven.

healthy hoohoo products are tested on gal pals, not animals, and are available at select Pacific Northwest Region Whole Foods Markets, online at,, and at fine body care boutiques and spas.

It deserves capitalization at the very least.

[Send your own PR Dummies nominations here.]