While listening to Aunt Eunice talk about her recent hip surgery and watching Little Cousin Jaydenlynne text furiously over her plateful of unwanted peas, you slowly chewed your turkey and thought about American's politicians and pundits, and how they are spending Thanksgiving. Am I right?
Here's how some of them celebrated (not a comprehensive list!):
- Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords put on the best Thanksgiving show of all the politicos we surveyed, handing out turkey meals to soldiers and retirees stationed at an Arizona Air Force base despite having to cope with the injuries she suffered when she was shot in January. Her astronaut husband joined her.
- President Barack Obama used his weekly radio address to thank the soldiers and wish everyone a happy holiday. He also called up some soldiers still serving in Iraq and Afghanistan—starting off with the salutation "Gobble gobble gobble, motherfucker" and letting the conversations go from there.
- Mayflower-of-the-Internet captain Matt Drudge ribbed the president with the headline, "Obama phones it in..." Then he drove a van full of turkey dinners to his nearest homeless shelter, served them all by himself, and read pilgrims stories to the kids.
- Newt Gingrich tweeted his thanks to the soldiers, in case they missed the full statement on his website.
- Soldier of peace Andrew Breitbart spent the day using his Twitter to attack Occupy Wall Street and their "silly semi-perma poopie rape cities," Congressman Ben Cardin, Sheryl Crow, "radical left wing propagandists," and probably others to come. Doesn't sound very "thankful" but this was the best he could do.
- Herman Cain and God blessed you and your family from Herman's Atlanta home, which is an abandoned Godfather's Pizza outlet.
- Michele Bachmann's going to play turkey bingo with her family and also play "Pin the Shame on the Jimmy Fallon."
- Vice-President Joe Biden is in Nantucket, staying with a retired investment banker named Lou but wishing he was driving his Corvette.
- Glenn Beck wrote us all a restrained, happy-holiday message that doesn't even mention Communists or Nazis.
[Image via AP]