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Hank Williams, Jr., living monument to the irrelevance of genes in determining ability, appeared this morning on Fox & Friends to, as philosophe Steve Doocy put it, "break down the 2012 GOP field." And break down he did!

We're going to provide the entire transcript (via Media Matters) here, because, wow:

GRETCHEN CARLSON (co-host): I'd love to pick your brain about politics. [This may actually be the most offensive thing said in the entire segment — Ed.]


CARLSON: All right. So, I'll start with an easy question, who do you like in the GOP race?


STEVE DOOCY (co-host): Nobody?

WILLIAMS: You remember the — you remember the golf game they had, ladies and gentlemen?

DOOCY: Yeah?

WILLIAMS: Remember the golf game?

DOOCY: Boehner?

WILLIAMS: That was one of the biggest political mistakes ever.


WILLIAMS: That turned a lot of people off. You know, watching, you know, it just didn't go over.

CARLSON: You mean when John Boehner played golf with President Obama?

WILLIAMS: Oh, yeah! Yeah. And Biden and Kasich, yeah. Uh-huh.

CARLSON: What did you not like about it? It seems to be a really pivotal moment for you.

WILLIAMS: Come on. Come on. It would be like Hitler playing golf with Netanyahu, OK?


WILLIAMS: Not hardly. In the country this shape is in, the shape this country's in, I mean, no, I don't think so.

BRIAN KILMEADE (co-host): Yeah, I don't understand that analogy, actually.

DOOCY: Well, it's — it's out there.

WILLIAMS: Well, I'm glad you don't, brother, because a lot of people do. You know, they're the enemy. They're the enemy.

KILMEADE: Who's the enemy?

WILLIAMS: Obama! And Biden! Are you kidding? The Three Stooges.

DOOCY: That's only two.

Okay, so, first of all, Netanyahu was born four years after Hitler died? So how would they even play golf with each other? Second of all, like... what?

ESPN pulled Williams' theme song from Monday Night Football tonight, so you may have to spend some time on Facebook explaining to your cousins how "free speech" works. Sorry!