John Huffman is just a regular old organic chemist. He is nearly 80 years old. And just because he invented all of the fake weed that kids these days are smoking doesn't mean he wants to hear your jokes, okay?

The LA Times has a delightful story today on Huffman, who discovered more than 400 "synthetic cannabinoids" during the course of his perfectly legal academic research career. That doesn't mean he expected you kids to run out and smoke them, for Chrissake. These things are dangerous. But of course you idiot kids run out to your "head shops" to buy "Spice" and "get high" on the most easily produced of these synthetic cannabinoids, and next thing you know every damn newspaper and TV hack in the world is calling up John Huffman to accuse him of getting the whole world stoned. "It's become a royal pain in the rear end," Huffman says, pardon his French.

Furthermore, even old John Huffman knows that fake weed is for losers.

Huffman supports banning them. But he also favors legalizing and taxing marijuana.

"You can't overdose on marijuana, but you might on these compounds," he said. "These things are dangerous, and marijuana isn't, really."

Old John Huffman for Head of the DEA!

[LAT. Photo via]