All three Kardashians blow off Kris Humphries' plus-size model sister. Mila Kunis gets hacked. A naked man with a Fudgesicle broke into Nicolas Cage's house. Padma Lakshmi bombs at an open mic night. Thursday gossip turns up its nose.

  • Three front row seats remained empty at Kris Humphries' plus-size model sister Kaela's New York Fashion Week runway debut, at the Richie Rich show, reportedly because "Kim [Kardashian] and her sisters were supposed to come," but didn't show. Kris was spotted making frantic cellphone calls before the show, maybe to beg them to come? Salt in the wound: Kris and Kaela went to Kylie and Kendall Jenner's runway shows. Nonetheless, the Richie Rich show went on. High point: Ice-T's impossibly curvaceous wife Coco popping out of her dress while being carried down the catwalk by "two hulking studs in tight underwear." Bet Kim, Khloe and Kourtney are sorry they missed it, now. [P6, Kim via Getty, Kris and Kaela via Splash, Kris via Getty, GlobalGrind]

Speaking of Kris Humphries, Fashion Week inspired him to get a mani-pedi. [DailyMail, image via Splash]

  • The next celebrity hacker victim will be Mila Kunis, TMZ says, but her "dirty" pictures are all of other people, like a mystery guy showing his penis, and Justin Timberlake wearing panties on his head. [TMZ]
  • On the press tour for his new movie Trespass, Nicolas Cage reminisced about the time a naked man with a Fudgesicle trespassed in his home: "It was two in the morning. I was living in Orange County at the time and was asleep with my wife. My two-year old at the time was in another room. I opened my eyes and there was a naked man wearing my leather jacket eating a Fudgesicle in front of my bed." He didn't press charges because the guy "had mental problems." [Reuters]
  • Lindsay Lohan went to Le Bain, a New York nightclub with multiple communal jacuzzis and lots of horny finance guys, with her mother and an extraordinary amount of cleavage. [P6]
  • Someone invited a 6-year-old Toddlers & Tiaras star to the Allure Fashion Week Lounge, and she threw tantrum because they refused to whiten her teeth. The forlorn PR girls didn't know what to do; they are only trained to quell tantrums in 21-year-old starlets and diva-like fashion editors. [P6]
  • Speaking of Fashion Week snubs, here's fashion director of Nordstrom Gregg Andrews bitching about Kate Middleton: "She is stylish, but she's not setting trends, she's following trends. If you take Kate out of the Royal Family, put her on a street in New York, you wouldn't look at her twice. She's a beautiful woman, but she blends into a crowd." Yeah, well, wait until you see the haute couture her kitchen mice are whipping up right now, you'll be sorry then, Mr. Maleficent Andrews. [DailyMail]
  • Eva Longoria doesn't talk to Tony Parker anymore. Finding hundreds of sexts sent to someone else's wife on his cellphone will do that to you. [Us]
  • To prove that she still eats, country-singing cricket LeAnn Rimes visited Us Weekly's office and posed with a platter of cookies. I've never seen someone burst into tears and vomit about the same time, but I'm pretty sure this is the face he or she would make right before it happened. [Us]
  • Padma Lakshmi attended one of storytelling open mic night at The Moth and took the stage to tell a story of her own, and to raise donations. It was so "grating," someone offered to donate $1000 "if you get off the stage right now." She accepted. [P6]
  • Ooh, first paparazzi baby pictures of Natalie Portman's 4-month son Aleph. Bonus: Benjamin Millepied wearing a baby bunting. [Us]